Yes!! @lydiaemery.bsky.social is leading an awesome empirical paper testing many of these ideas!

Thanks for the encouragement Erin!!

Thanks so much, Jon!! That means a lot! 🤗

Thanks so much, Eli! It's been so awesome to work on these ideas together!!

Read more here: osf.io/preprints/ps...

RAM Theory explains how a funny moment at dinner can transform into an inside joke, or a stroll through the park into a cherished tradition – and how, as a whole, the microculture shapes both relationship outcomes and the broader lives of the individuals involved. 5/

We conceptualize close relationships as microcultures, with private language (a pet rabbit's nickname of "Alfaroo Bunchkins"), stories (the picnic fiasco), rituals (nightly backgammon), morality (animal welfare), identity (adrenaline junkies), and shared reality (belief in extraterrestrial life). 4/

Culture is often thought of as something that exists on a large scale. But it's also created within the smallest possible group: two people. 3/

In a new preprint on Relationships as Microcultures Theory, @emmamiller.bsky.social , @lydiaemery.bsky.social , @joshcjackson.bsky.social , and @elijfinkel.bsky.social and I propose that these everyday idiosyncrasies are far from trivial – they are the relationship itself. 2/

New preprint! ✨ Do you and your partner have made-up words ("eggy" to mean awkward)? Do you and your bestie have an anecdote you love to tell together (that time one of you tripped over an acorn)? Do you and your closest colleague have a cherished ritual (weekly lunch at "the usual spot")? 🧵

Thrilled to release this year’s program for the Shared Reality Virtual Conference (Mar 24-25)!!

Register here to receive the Zoom link (free!):
universityofhouston.iad1.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV_...

Organized with: @emmamiller.bsky.social @abdoe.bsky.social @changlu-cl.bsky.social

A little over a week left for blitz applications for the conference!

Please share to those that might be interested :)

Registration portal: universityofhouston.iad1.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV_...

We’re excited to announce this year’s Shared Reality Virtual Conference on Mar 24-25!
Register below to receive the Zoom link (free!). Submit a data blitz anytime until Feb 20.
Organized with @abdoe.bsky.social @emmamiller.bsky.social @changlu-cl.bsky.social

That's great! These insights are meant to be applicable to any conversation starter/ topic, so there's certainly no need to ask people about their weekends to start riffing 😊

Thanks so much, Paul!!

Opinion | You’re Probably Doing Small Talk Wrong

What kinds of conversations spark instant connection?

Excited to share my first NYT Guest Essay, with @ericaboothby.bsky.social.

We argue that playful riffing — creating a little world together — forges and deepens relationships through shared reality.

www.nytimes.com/2025/09/04/o...

So excited for this year’s Shared Reality Virtual Conference! ✨

So proud of my incredible postdoc @cenestrom.bsky.social for her awesome new JPSP about how shared reality with romantic partners fosters greater meaning in life! 🎉

We know that people tend to see the world similarly with ingroup members. But do people share reality with just anyone in their ingroup?

In a 🔥new paper🔥we find that people are specifically motivated to create a shared reality with those who support their goals.

@mrossignacmilon.bsky.social

🧵1/

We’re (@mrossignacmilon.bsky.social & @emmamiller.bsky.social) excited to announce the first-ever *free* Shared Reality Virtual Mini-Conference on Feb 21 2024! You can register below to receive the Zoom link. Submit a data blitz anytime until Jan 10!

northwestern.az1.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV_...