I need him to stay home.

Hah! He is living in a dream world.

Is he really running for president again.

I'm definitely going to watch this one, if the photos don't come out this week and ruin his hopes.

Friday night at 7, Kash will get his firing text.

Next time he gives a presidential campaign speech, Hegseth will get his.

Again

Please, I must work at Info Onion!

Also - can he do it without asides and commentary? I don't think he can.

You're too kind.

Good for you!

When merit stops being determined by the color of our penises.

I've been sending him instructions and hate mail for a while, yet it never occurred to me to ask Jodi Kantor to do it. Thanks, @jodikantor.bsky.social!

My weekend grading papers

He is a professional dilettante. The sooner he forgets about government and starts a hedge fund the better.

Thaaaaaanks

Y'all, I really cannot handle it if Rand Paul becomes the smartest Republican.

He hasn't done any leading in a long time.

Jesus Christ, where are you when there's a threat of a Vivek sex tape, Lord? Take the frigging wheel.

Re: Swalwell. Don't say date rape. That's diminishing. Are you using it as a euphemism for drugging? That's obviously worse, not better! Say drugged and raped.

Vatican II entitled!

It's sad. Did she bribe him with that? Because yuck. Or did he threaten her to get it? Far beyond yuck.

I have, ever since reading, looked at every phone book to see if it's optimum sized for use in the box.

Thanks! Going away to think about the HLOTKS the musical.

I like that he thinks the correction is to pretend he's the only person on earth who doesn't recognize a picture of white Jesus.

I'm sorry. Did you bury the lede?

Say pocketbook one more time.

I fucking hate it when Rand Paul is the most right.

Robinson has a sports betting section. I wonder what those numbers are.

Jessica's mom was a delightful young girl with a terrific mom. Facts.

O, sadness. It took me awhile to untangle. Maybe Paddinton 5?