Btw those first "friends" did apologize to me only when the person they defended fucked them over. And it really just sucks. It happens too often, so often that it's funny.

Sorry for coming back to be messy, it's just that this whole situation is unfortunately just a cycle that made me distance myself from this stupid fucking community.

I think over time I've just learned to stop befriending people who either think I'm the most talented saint or try to establish some kind of connection through the fact they think we both are never gonna be better people.

Then in the vocaloid community I was obsessed over by a man older than me who tried to claim me as being the next top western voca p? Then immediately befriending Assfart. It just sucks. Like how many people in this community suck ass.

I left the UTAU community due to it, having been bullied and ousted by people I thought were friends, then insulted for standing up to someone who was manipulating me, then picked up AGAIN by another horrible person--

Man, I know my experience in this isn't important compared to the victims, but as someone who was involved in the community for so long (since I was 13) it's horrifying how many people I met that "took me under their wing" were awful people.

Oh yea btw if you’re defending ghost and pals please block me please please thank you bye.

jumpscared

you can buy a penny candy in the 1900s!

im planning on making it my research thesis in uni LMAO it happens a lot and it's a symptom of a greater problem with internet echo chambers. i could go on and on about it but it's just... a lot.

speaking from experience, it's okay to be struggling with a mental illness, but it doesn't give you a get away free card whenever you Hurt people. so i completely agree with. everything. especially since im one of those ex-friends of this dude.

unfortunately anti-recovery isn't just about DID, it also effects a ton of other different places. It's usually prevalent in areas based around mental illness, so like, a community based around not getting better and saying it's okay to be your "worst self." :/

I still produce and make music, and I'm no longer super scared of pointing to things I made. But I'd rather leave CATD and all that BS behind JHGHSJGHASG.

Extra update: I'm doing good now. I honestly was doing a LOT better than I thought, and I was able to complete a lot of my therapy goals and no longer qualify as having severe depression lol. I still don't plan on coming back to the Vocaloid scene as Mismatcher P, or trying to make a name for myself

this is how i feel rn

guys. how we fuckin feelin

The weather was crazy in columbus and I had to rush to get my Psych homework done while I still had power. I will not let the Weather (Derogatory) take my A away from me

This poor girl in my class talked about her experience on the internet and I just felt sad. Took me literal years to realize how horrifying the online experience was and how I can't even justify people disturbing themselves to cope anymore. It just makes us all worse and more horrible to be around.

I think courses on how to self-soothe and advocate would go a long way too. Feels like a grand many of people in the raised on the internet era CAN'T self-soothe and usually just go to other means of doing so, aka over-relying on codependence or self-sabotage. Which creates many toxic bonds.

Small update because it's been months: Got As on all my psych related courses. Probably gonna look to going into diagnostics or social work. I think getting people consistent resources will do more help, especially since we don't have good mental health education.

I'm taking a break from social media and focusing on my Psych degree. I genuinely hate what the internet has done to me, and I just need some time off. I'm hoping whatever I learn will put healing forward and make the world a better place, but I also need to heal. The internet is a horrible place.

I-See feat. YiXi YouTube video by Fenris (Spores-P)

hey vocaloid community i make songs with tumblr sexymen #vocaloid
youtu.be/PdkWxcmgk3Q?...

still capabl of art

Also not all horror goes over the same topics. It's nice to get told about the specific content in horror because I can know what I can avoid and also what will be cathartic to me. Like, I generally seek out horror with mental health topics, so getting that content warning isn't only helpful one way

Which one of you guys is the Australian that has been playing my music literally on repeat. I have 854 streams all from the same area. Are you guys okay

We need more vocaloid producers in stem. Im making this a new social movement

yeah, im a vocaloid producer... yeah i like health... wht of it...... /j (honestly, I think bio-engineering needs to be used more, i think it could solve plenty of issues.)

teto nation what is up #vocaloid #kasaneteto

have not released a song in ten billion years

anyways

distrokid.com/hyperfollow/...