Private Markets Charge More Also dual-class SpaceX stock, fake Iranian crypto fees and Global Tetrahedron M&A.

I am stuck in this incentive structure where my behaviour is going to be aligned with pushing readers into this newsletter. www.bloomberg.com/opinion/news...

The SEC Can’t Find Victims Disgorgement, private credit cyclicality, time value of hedge fund managers, pre-tax alpha and an SEC podcast.

This newsletter is built on regulatory arbitrage that faces immediate scrutiny. www.bloomberg.com/opinion/news...

Tax Alpha Needs Some Real Alpha Tax-aware funds, World Liberty tokens, Exxon proxies, Cybertruck buyers and NewBird AI.

It’s the hottest product in Greenwich. Fathers at a recent local sports game were fixated on Bloomberg's Money Stuff newsletter. www.bloomberg.com/opinion/news...

AIbirds NewBird AI, an Avis Budget squeeze, sports factor models and recursive online courses.

This newsletter is broadly unregulated and unsupervised. www.bloomberg.com/opinion/news...

Banks Aren’t Worried About Private Credit Also BDC secondaries, carbon removal removal and mention market correlation trading.

On the day of writing this newsletter, I sat myself in front of two glowing screens to “monitor the situation.” www.bloomberg.com/opinion/news...

Prediction Market Making Is Hard Liquidity provision, event resolution, the Mythos trade, fintech concierges and AI Zuck.

This newsletter is trained on my mannerisms, tone and publicly available statements, as well as my own recent thinking on company strategies, so that readers might feel more connected to me through interactions with it. www.bloomberg.com/opinion/news...

I profit from this newsletter while simultaneously claiming it is harmful. www.bloomberg.com/opinion/news...

Not Merging Is Not Securities Fraud Also Universal SPARC, private credit redemptions, private credit liquidity and E. coli at the corporate retreat.

This newsletter is terrible, but it sounds terrible out there, too. www.bloomberg.com/opinion/news...

Truth Machines Go to War Also Grok sales, QQQ competition, Altman alignment and VCs doing laundry.

This newsletter is unbelievably persuasive. Like, Jedi mind tricks. www.bloomberg.com/opinion/news...

Prediction Market Structured Notes Also BDC redemptions, private credit bid/ask, GLP-1 marketing and Jamie Dimon Media.

We continue to observe a meaningful disconnect between the public dialogue on Money Stuff and the underlying trends in our newsletter. www.bloomberg.com/opinion/news...

OpenAI Is Almost Public Also Snaptivism, karaoke, umami and swearing at Claude.

This newsletter is (broken | useless | terrible | awful | horrible) | | screw (this | you) | so frustrating | this sucks | damn it. www.bloomberg.com/opinion/news...

Are Algae Securities Fraud? Carbon onsets, mini-millionaire hedge funds and float-adjusted indexes.

Society’s needs evolve, and so does this newsletter. www.bloomberg.com/opinion/news...

Private Assets Are Coming to 401(k)s Also LME NDAs, concierge financial advisers, momentum and Crispin Odey’s dungeon.

This newsletter's judgment is presumed to be reasonable and is entitled to significant deference. www.bloomberg.com/opinion/news...

Weather Prediction Prediction Also a fake Warner bidder, bank re-tranching, spy satellites, Birkin grommets and 420.

My bizarre and highly questionable method of completing Money Stuff, this “joke” (which was no doubt intentional), was just the final example in a parade of issues and events with this newsletter. www.bloomberg.com/opinion/news...

Private Credit Has Some Debt GAV vs. NAV, anti-private equity certifications, Tricolor, the like button and unemployability.

LinkedIn recently reported that I hit the heart-in-hand icon intended to show a sign of ‘support’ concerning this newsletter. www.bloomberg.com/opinion/news...

Private Credit Is Not on Sale Also SpaceX proxies, sports betting and oil insider trading.

This newsletter should reflect current market dynamics, even when they do not fully align with our assessment of long-term intrinsic Money Stuff. www.bloomberg.com/opinion/news...

Elon Did Some Securities Fraud Also AI inequality, Tesla/SpaceX Terafab, JPMorgan monitoring and AI startup parties.

It may not be my wisest newsletter. I don’t know if I would call it my stupidest. www.bloomberg.com/opinion/news...

Tokens Are Not Securities Crypto classification, PE concealment, Elon Musk legal realism, Trevor Milton, big cowbells and SPACEs.

This newsletter is like, 'Welcome to the club. You can withstand the fire. We can trust you now.' www.bloomberg.com/opinion/news...

Anti-Private Equity Is Good Business Traffic flaggers, tax alpha, pod exhaustion and DAT dividends.

This newsletter is run by investors who’ve never set foot in your neighborhood. www.bloomberg.com/opinion/news...

Make the Predictions Come True Also SpaceX SPVs, shareholder democracy, tariff refunds, OBDC II and watch signals.

I end this newsletter with money in my pocket, and also earn back the life I had until now. www.bloomberg.com/opinion/news...

Lever the Predictions Margin, private credit marks, assassination trades, distractions and the watch-to-house ratio.

This newsletter is just glad there’s something to talk about that isn’t software exposures and private credit. www.bloomberg.com/opinion/news...

Private Credit Gets Marked Down Mark-to-market accounting, Kalshi call spreads, ChatGPT privilege and random number generators.

Money Stuff is still growing and I expect its newsletters to continue performing. www.bloomberg.com/opinion/news...

Bill Ackman Wants Your Money Again The return of PSUS, chatbot meme stocks, S&P binaries and Cluely vs. TechCrunch.

This newsletter simplifies it in a way that everybody can really understand, so it takes out the intimidation factor of the markets. www.bloomberg.com/opinion/news...

BlackRock Guards the Gates HLEND, is anti-ESG securities fraud, AI/consulting synergies and everything is she-curities fraud.

Among a segment of those reading this newsletter, a sense of financial nihilism is setting in. www.bloomberg.com/opinion/news...

Be Liquid When Others Are Illiquid An SREIT tender, dip buyers, the dispersion trade and nonfungible bolivianos.

Whatever fresh shocks have rippled through markets, individual investors have fallen back on the same strategy: Money Stuff. www.bloomberg.com/opinion/news...

People Are Worried About BCRED Liquidity Also FAT Brands securitization, 401(k) liquidity and Jeffrey Epstein is securities fraud.

I provide integral centralized functions that enable the Money Stuff Entities and their brands to operate and generate revenue. www.bloomberg.com/opinion/news...

Everyone Wants a Pension Retail private credit, war insider trading and Drake on Stake.

Despite certain widespread notions of this newsletter being rigged in some people’s favors or Money Stuff not being real, we have no direct control of this newsletter. www.bloomberg.com/opinion/news...

War Markets Have Some Bugs Rule 40.11, Nasdaq 100 binaries, a DAT proxy fight, paralinguistic features, lying to VCs and Lloyd Blankfein’s memoir.

Paralinguistic features of this newsletter, such as assertiveness, arousal, and nervousness, contain significant economic information. www.bloomberg.com/opinion/news...

The DOGE Doubt Trade Also the Optimum lawsuit, venture capital fraud and insider trading victims.

This newsletter's high growth pressure generates incentives to exaggerate or fabricate performance. www.bloomberg.com/opinion/news...

Kalshi Found Some Insider Traders Also hedge fund hiring, OpenAI shorts, midnight M&A deadlines and Claude for hackers.

First you need sweet, sticky Money Stuff—thick as honey, but oh, it bites your nose! www.bloomberg.com/opinion/news...