my search history after this weeks episode of the Pitt 🙂‍↕️

I can tell they numbed me up good at the dentist because upon exiting into the 35 degree weather, my lower left quadrant didn’t feel a bit of cold 🙂‍↔️

sometimes you fall asleep with your contacts in, on your couch, with all the lights still on, using your pile of unfolded laundry as a makeshift blanket, with your phone uncharged
and on those days you’re allowed to call out of work

I was supposed to get my period Christmas Day but it was late
Call that Mother Mary Maxing
Absolutely Virgin Mary Pilled

This pizza made me throw up for the first time in 6 years. The inventor of stuffed crust pizza now should sleep with one eye open because I am COMING FOR THEM

whoever invented stuffed crust pizza deserves an open mouth kiss and yes I am offering

who hired an etsy witch to curse me because why am I sick, hurt my back, and also just realized too late I ate moldy bread?? Please forgive me for whatever I did to hurt you 😭

I’ve reached that point in being sick where if I don’t fully shed my skin I’m going to lose my mind 🤩

just finished a book that sent me into such an emotional spiral (in a good way!) that I started cleaning my apartment?? at midnight???

if you’re going to talk on the phone in a public restroom it should be required by law that you put it on speaker so I can hear both sides of the conversation
I’m your captive audience!! If you ask “and then what happened??” one more time I’m gonna start asking too!!

do I like this coffee? or do I like the 10 coffee creamers and 6.5 packets of sugar I put in it to make the flavor unrecognizable? who’s to say 😌

I remember nothing else from my dream but being on a water ride and saying “that horse is a fascist”

I’m 75% of the way through the final book in a trilogy and they just killed my favorite character

the rage I feel reaches so far within my soul I worry it will catch aflame and burn out of my body

I’m gonna need 3-5 business weeks to emotionally recover from the C3 critical role finale 💖🥹😭

I just finished writing the final part of My Demon Roommate episode 11 🥹💖 the Mortal visiting Hell arc is done!! Now to film it 🤩

they want to know if you like their strawberry hat, they just got it this morning 🍓

My period started today so for fun I’m getting extra hydrated and watching movies that have historically made me cry 🤩

Will do!! 💖🫂

there was also a subplot where I had to deliver a martini glass of booze from the Panera bread I was getting food at to someone on a higher floor of the skyscraper we were in and I got lost and found a play where people were walking across the stage dressed as vegetables 🥕🥦🌽

had a dream I went to see an incredibly long superhero movie that was fine but had these HUGE swathes of dull plot so everyone in the theater kept leaving for snacks & switching seats& talking loudly to each other & flirting with their seat neighbors-i wish every movie going experience was like this

The difficulty with which I parallel park needs to be studied by a medical professional. Or a psychic. Because they’re either going to find an anti-parallel gene, or a little guy at the controls in my head who’s screaming just as loudly as me 🚙

leaving this blank because I have none. zero thoughts. head empty. I only know fine dining and breathing.

THE RMS TITANIC GC NAME ☠️😂

you know how 5 year olds drink bottled drinks? that’s what I sound like right now eating dinner with a stuffy nose 😷

deepest apologizes to my neighbors for screaming 3 times in a row at 11pm, but some big heart little heart stuff 💕 and some mushroom stuff 🍄 just happened in critical role- I promise I’m not being murdered, I’m just being a nerd about love

it’s me and my 3am gummy worms against the world

this is the energy I’m bringing into #arcane act 2

this is the kindest thing anyone has ever said to me 💖📖🎨🥘🌲😈👯‍♀️

i’m so excited!! gonna pass the time before I can watch the new eps tonight by coming up with more theories lmao