The AFL's 'Cooked' Index - Neds Blog I watched the new Louis Theroux doco on the Manosphere the other day and while it wasn’t my favourite Theroux (either The Settlers or the Weird Weekends about rap), all I could think about was those f...

Chat, are we cooked?

These four AFL storylines are asking that very question.

A 'Cooked' Index

#AFL #afldeessaints #afllionsdogs

www.neds.com.au/blog/2026/03...

‘He’s been broken’: King reclaims crown in epic battle as ‘whipping boy’ finally arrives — 3-2-1 ‘He’s been broken’: King reclaims crown in epic battle as ‘whipping boy’ finally arrives — 3-2-1

MELBOURNE 🟦🟥

HELL OF A START FOR THE DEMONS 🔥🔥

The new-look Dees stun the Saints in a brilliant game, condemning their hyped rivals to an 0-2 start despite a big trade period.

MORE >> bit.ly/3NzFvvU
#AFLDeesSaints

A screenshot showing the final score of an AFL Round 1 match between Melbourne and St Kilda at the MCG on Wurundjeri land on March 15, 2026. Melbourne defeated St Kilda 120–107, with the Demons winning by 13 points. The graphic displays team logos, scoring breakdowns (18.12 to 15.17), match date and time, and a “FULL TIME” banner.

A new dawn, a new @melbournefc.bsky.social - and what a game to kick off the 2026 season!
#GoDees #DemonSpirit #MelbourneFC #AFL #AustralianRulesFootball #AFLDeesSaints

#AFL #AFLRound1 #AFLDeesSaints #DemonSpirit #SaintsFooty #latergram

#AFL #AFLRound1 #AFLDeesSaints #DemonSpirit #SaintsFooty #latergram

The recruitment of Mihocek could be the best thing to ever happen to JVR 🔴🔵 #AFLDeesSaints

Great stuff Melbourne, really terrific win in Steven King’s coaching debut! Look so much more positive & energised, and even just another Pickett and Van Rooyen finally realising his full potential add so much besides. Dees going to be pretty exciting to watch this season I reckon. #afldeessaints

2026 Round 1 - Melbourne v St Kilda
#AFL
#AFLDeesSaints

#afldeessaints Well done Melbourne

NEW DEES ARE FUN 🔥

#DemonSpirit | #AFLDeesSaints

Dees footy is hot!!! #AFLDEESSAINTS

#AFLDeesSaints Demons unleash the fiery pits at the MCG. Melbourne 120 defeat St Kilda 107

No longer a catch in cricket.
#LiamRyan

#AFLDeesSaints

33’28”HT MCG
@melbournefc.bsky.social 3.3 9.7 (61): J.van Rooyen 5; B.Mihocek 2; C.Windsor, L.Pickett;
@stkildafc.bsky.social 3.4 9.5 (59): J.Higgins, N.Wanganeen-Milera,* M.Hall 2; L.Ryan, M.Owens, D.Wilson
#AFL #AFLRound1 #AFLDeesSaints #DemonSpirit #SaintsFooty

35’5” QT@MCG
@melbournefc.bsky.social 3.3 (21): C.Windsor 6’; J.van Rooyen 19’; 20’;
@stkildafc.bsky.social 3.4 (22): N.Wanganeen-Milera 3’; L.Ryan 7; M.Hall 8’; J.Higgins 33’
#AFL #AFLRound1 #AFLDeesSaints #DemonSpirit #SaintsFooty

Most recent MELB players to kick 5+ goals by half time
2000 PF Jeff Farmer v nth
2002 R04 David Neitz v wce
2002 R15 David Neitz v carl
2004 R02 David Neitz v rich
2006 R10 David Neitz v stk
2016 R06 Jesse Hogan v stk
2026 R01 JACOB VAN ROOYEN v STK

#AFL #AFLDeesSaints

Nasiah Wanganeen-Milera kicks first goal of the #AFLDeesSaints game
Makes it 3 straight goals v MELB in 5 minutes & 46 seconds

#AFL

The MCG pre-match for Melbourne vs St Kilda, round 1, 2026.

Absolutely perfect conditions.
Let's go Dees!
#AFL
#AFLDeesSaints

Melbourne v St Kilda @ M.C.G. 18 models give Melbourne a 51-74% chance of victory over St Kilda at the M.C.G. on Sunday with an average tipped margin of 7 points, but 11 models give St Kilda a 51-62% chance with a margin of 5 points.

Melbourne by 1 with a 51% win chance. Melbourne v St Kilda @ M.C.G. #AFLDeesSaints https://squiggle.com.au/game/?gid=38506

Sportsbet offering $2.44 for Dees and $1.56 for Saints Melbourne enters a new era at the MCG facing a disciplined St Kilda side that pushed the Magpies to the limit in their Opening Round encounter Dees (14th in 2025, 7W, 16L) finished last year in a significant slump and must now adapt to the departures of superstars Christian Petracca and Clayton Oliver Saints (9th, 0W, 1L) were highly competitive in their Opening Round loss, maintaining strong pressure for three quarters but ultimately lacking the offensive class to match Collingwood Melbourne recruit Jack Steele faces his former club in his debut for the Demons; his pre-season form has been elite, providing the physical stoppage presence the team needs St Kilda defender Jack Sinclair was a consistent performer in Round 0, recording high meterage and providing the rebounding drive central to Ross Lyon’s defensive system Saints currently hold a 2-game winning streak over Dees, having defeated them twice during the 2025 campaign by restricting the Demons’ scoring options Melbourne's future depends on the integration of Steele and the explosive move of Kozzie Pickett into the midfield, but they face one of the league's most disciplined defensive units TIP: St Kilda by 20+

🔵 🔴 😈 🔵 GAME DAY ⚫️ 😇 ⚪️ 🔴
@melbournefc.bsky.social 0.0 (00);
@stkildafc.bsky.social 0.0 (00)
#AFL #AFLRound1 #AFLDeesSaints #DemonSpirit #SaintsFooty

AFL: Melbourne v St Kilda - Crowd: 6,721 @ TIO Traeger Park (Alice Springs) #AFLDeesSaints

The winning heavens are open again with a win in the Alice.

😇❤️🤍🖤

#AFL #AFLDeesSaints #SaintsFooty

Expected Scores

Melbourne v St Kilda, Round 12

Match Stats
wheeloratings.com/afl_match_st...

#AFLDeesSaints #AFL

#AFL #AFLRound12 #AFLDeesSaints #DemonSpirit #SaintsFooty

28’17”¾-time@TIO.Alice
@melbournefc.bsky.social 2.2 6.9 7.13 (55): C.Petracca 2; B.Fritsch,* J.Melksham, K.Chandler, A.Johnson, H.Petty
@stkildafc.bsky.social 6.2 9.4 11.6 (72): D.Butler 4; M.Hall,I.Keeler 2; T.Travaglia, H.Clark, Brad Hill
#AFL #AFLRound12 #AFLDeesSaints #DemonSpirit #SaintsFooty

2025 Round 12 - Melbourne v St Kilda
#AFLDeesSaints
#AFL

V/AFL teams to win games in all 8 main states and territories
WBD
PORT
WCE
FREM
MELB
BRIS
GWS
STK

#AFLDeesSaints #AFL

Never in doubt.

#AFLDeesSaints

Only the fifth instance of a final score of 7.21.63 in V/#AFL history. It was previously recorded by Collingwood in 1933, Fitzroy in 1946, St Kilda in 1970 and Collingwood in 1983.

#AFLDeesSaints