Thank you for playing #AlternativeWinterOlympicsEvents this Baltic February evening!

Truly, your tweets glissandoed along the icy airwaves like the finest curling stones made on Ailsa Craig.

But, hark, tis late, so time to furl and sleep the innocent sleep that knits up the raveled sleave of care.

#AlternativeWinterOlympicsEvents
Poor people from the Himalayas culture and pastimes.

a cartoon of a man with a headache and a red swirl around his head ALT: a cartoon of a man with a headache and a red swirl around his head

#AlternativeWinterOlympicsEvents
Non Nordic non Canadian stuff that the Dutch are hopeless at.

two penguins are walking across a snowy field with the national geographic logo in the background ALT: two penguins are walking across a snowy field with the national geographic logo in the background

#AlternativeWinterOlympicsEvents
Ice running

#AlternativeWinterOlympicsEvents
Draught excluder design.

Best film about flesh-eating snowman and snow-women zombies. #AlternativeWinterOlympicsEvents

Best interpretative dance movement on snow. #AlternativeWinterOlympicsEvents

a woman sitting at a table eating a bag of doritos ALT: a woman sitting at a table eating a bag of doritos

#AlternativeWinterOlympicsEvents
Cheese Curling

Best use of A.I. in a snowball fight [that doesn't involve the use of data centres]. #AlternativeWinterOlympicsEvents

Special award for the language that has the most words for snow. #AlternativeWinterOlympicsEvents

#AlternativeWinterOlympicsEvents
The kettle to hot water bottle dash.

a woman is standing in front of a door holding a large piece of snow . ALT: a woman is standing in front of a door holding a large piece of snow .

Bravest attempt to get the cat to leave the house when there's snow on the ground. #AlternativeWinterOlympicsEvents

a man in a suit and tie is giving a thumbs up in a crowd of people . ALT: a man in a suit and tie is giving a thumbs up in a crowd of people .

#AlternativeWinterOlympicsEvents snow consumption

Quickest recovery from chillblains following an event. #AlternativeWinterOlympicsEvents

a cartoon character in a yellow raincoat is standing in the rain near a bus stop sign ALT: a cartoon character in a yellow raincoat is standing in the rain near a bus stop sign

#AlternativeWinterOlympicsEvents
Bus stop endurance.

Best interior design makeover of an igloo. #AlternativeWinterOlympicsEvents

Best snowball fighter. #AlternativeWinterOlympicsEvents

The 'Destroying Cliches' Award for building snow-women, not snowmen. #AlternativeWinterOlympicsEvents

a cricket game is being played in front of a dafabet ad ALT: a cricket game is being played in front of a dafabet ad

#AlternativeWinterOlympicsEvents
Arctic cricket. Oh no we can't find them.

spongebob patrick and squidward play in the snow ALT: spongebob patrick and squidward play in the snow

#AlternativeWinterOlympicsEvents
Five a side snowball fight.

Best homemade sledge from a wooden palette from the co-op shoppie. #AlternativeWinterOlympicsEvents

Most interesting explanation of the etymology of 'bonspiel'. #AlternativeWinterOlympicsEvents

Best use of wood from a garden fence to create a home-made set of wooden skis. #AlternativeWinterOlympicsEvents

Best walking like a penguin impersonation on the way home from the pub on icy & snowy pavements. #AlternativeWinterOlympicsEvents

Cross country skiing from Forfar to Fintry in berry clothes.
#AlternativeWinterOlympicsEvents

Highest number of failed drug tests in the Speed Skating event. #AlternativeWinterOlympicsEvents

The 'après-ski' lifetime achievement award for the most impressive euphemism for nipping down to the pub after a hard day's skiing. #AlternativeWinterOlympicsEvents

Most imaginative way of cheating in curling... [am still amazed that it's even possible to cheat at curling... and of all the countries that did it, turns out it was the Canucks - just utterly surreal!] #AlternativeWinterOlympicsEvents

Best approach to switching the heating on and off to save dosh on energy bills. #AlternativeWinterOlympicsEvents

Defrosting the car windows in fewer than 10 seconds. #AlternativeWinterOlympicsEvents

#games #HashTagGame #HashTagGames #PopUpGame #PopUpGames #WinterOlympics #Olympics #wallflowers