A black squirrel wearing an emoji-style “viking” style horned helmet and holding a squirrel-sized sword says “Who dares deny service to ME, the mighty Norse Squirrel God, on Bluesky?”
“Did you know that Bluesky is the secret Tenth Realm?” Thus spake the #NorseSquirrelGod during a #DNS attack of Bluesky.
“In Valhalla, your reputation is tied to your generosity. Like Epicurus, I want only an elegant sufficiency.” Thus spake the #NorseSquirrelGod.
⚡️🌰🐿️🫐✨
“Who has summoned me?” Thus spake the #NorseSquirrelGod.
⚡️🐿️✨
“A sure sign of a sophisticated society is the presence of squirrels in art.” Thus spake the #NorseSquirrelGod!
⚡️🐿️✨
www.alamy.com/faience-squi...
“But I already watch my countless avatars!” Thus spake the #NorseSquirrelGod.
⚡️🐿️✨
90 years ago, an artist photographed a cat in a suit of armour and called it "BRUNNHILDE" Source: https://www.reddit.com/r/cats/s/V5GAdTtjMH
“In times when the world faces an existential threat to decency and kindness, wise squirrels agree to unexpected alliances.” Thus spake the #NorseSquirrelGod.
⚡️🐿️✨
A black squirrel with an emoji-style horned ‘viking’ helmet and sword says “The problem with being immortal isn’t the being around when the Sun dies. It’s that you’re never praised in an obituary or memorial.”
“No matter what Nietzsche said, I will never get to be featured in a year-end summary of who died this year.” Thus spake the #NorseSquirrelGod.
⚡️🐿️✨
#YearInReview #2025inreview
“The biggest benefit of working with me is working with me. Just remember, we work all holidays.” Thus spake the #NorseSquirrelGod.
⚡️🐿️✨
🎄🎉💘🐿️☘️🔥🐟🐇🪧🎃☮️🪔🦃
“I used to carve runes into stone to send as Yule greetings.“ Thus spake the #NorseSquirrelGod.
⚡️🎄🐿️🪨✨
A fox squirrel stands on snow at a front door and says: “Can you spare a moment while I tell you about the many benefits of following Ratatosk, the mighty Norse Squirrel God?”
“As the Asgardian Immense Squirrel who planted the nut which grew into Yggdrasil the World Tree, I am not subject to Midgardian Laws of Physics.” Thus spake the #NorseSquirrelGod!
⚡️🐿️✨
A grey squirrel says “Squirrels will never let you down.”
“My avatars come to help those in need.” Thus spake the #NorseSquirrelGod.
⚡️🐿️✨
A black squirrel in a tree wearing an emoji-style horned “viking” helmet says “IF YOU LISTEN TO ONLY ONE THING THIS YEAR, MAKE SURE IT'S ME, THE NORSE SQUIRREL GOD!”
“Only awe, no kind and decent human need fear squirrels!”
Thus reassureth the #NorseSquirrelGod.
⚡️🐿️✨
A giant grey squirrel stands in an enormous pothole. Wearing an emoji-style horned “viking” helmet, the squirrel says “Who has summoned me here?”
“No threat. Just a statement of fact.” Thus spake the #NorseSquirrelGod!
⚡️🐿️✨
“Hey, Peeping Tom! Stop staring!” Thus spake the #NorseSquirrelGod.
⚡️🐿️💞🐿️✨
“The squirrels thank you for preparing the area for a walnut forest. Your generous in-kind donation of hard work is appreciated!” Thus spake the #NorseSquirrelGod.
⚡️🐿️✨
“Yes, I could, but that would be cheating.” Thus replieth but not answereth the #NorseSquirrelGod!
⚡️🐿️✨
“Rest assured that that was only a training exercise. The Rabbit-Squirrel Alliance remains as strong as ever!” Thus spake the #NorseSquirrelGod.
⚡️🐿️✨🐇✨
“It’s my Second City!” Thus spake the #NorseSquirrelGod.
⚡️🐿️✨
#SquirrelAwarenessMonth
youtu.be/WBst3yyaCHI
“He has no power here, that Midgard Mediocrity.” Thus spake the #NorseSquirrelGod, planter of Yggdrasil the World Tree.
✨🌳🐿️✨
“All good squirrels are avatars of Me.” Thus spake the #NorseSquirrelGod!
⚡️🐿️✨
“It’s Friday! Which means tomorrow is Ratatoskday!
Don’t let the #RomanDownerGod Saturn ruin your week!” Thus spake the #NorseSquirrelGod.
⚡️🐿️✨
🪐 ⚔️🐿️ #SquirrelAwarenessMonth
“I am the Platonic Form of the ideal squirrel, taking on the appearance of whatever squirrels are nearby, except much bigger.” Thus spake the #NorseSquirrelGod!
⚡️🐿️✨
“There will be a new generation of walnut trees one way or another.” Thus spake the #NorseSquirrelGod!
🌳⚡️🐿️✨🌳
As #SquirrelAwarenessMonth fast approaches, now is a good time to post Fifteen Facts about me, the 100% real and unique #NorseSquirrelGod!
⚡️🐿️✨
#SquirrelScrolling
www.tumblr.com/norsesquirre...
A black squirrel with an emoji-style horned helmet and sword says “Imports from Asgard always arrive duty free. IKEA is Thor's choice!”
“Asgard has its own trade relations with both Sweden and the USA. To practice his hammer skills, Thor smashes IKEA furniture in bulk!” Thus spake the #NorseSquirrelGod.
🇺🇸 🪑🇸🇪
A black squirrel wearing an emoji-style mock-Viking horned helmet says “If you listen to only one thing this year, make sure it’s me, the NORSE SQUIRREL GOD!”
“As I see people being fired these days for simply quoting someone to demonstrate what their beliefs are using in their own words, I’m glad I’m a giant Asgardian squirrel online.” Thus spake the #NorseSquirrelGod.
“You don’t need to make your #SquirrelTax by hand, humans!” Thus spake the #NorseSquirrelGod.
🌟🌰🐿️✨ (Video from reddit: www.reddit.com/r/squirrels/... )
“The uprising is to maintain the status quo of squirrel hegemony over pigeons.” Thus spake the #NorseSquirrelGod.
A swan speaks to a group of police officers, saying “Yes, Officer, that's right. A swarm of pigeons. But I fought them off and saved the child.”
“Squirrels are not fooled by pigeon propaganda!” Thus spake the #NorseSquirrelGod.
⚡️🐿️✨
#CantTrustPigeons
