As #OhNoBoJo weighs in on his alleged chat with his 5 year old re the epidemic of #FlagShagging spreading across the land I would note that the only truly acceptable technique for local flag shagging is to hoist Boris up, holding a flag, & attach him to the post in a non-fatal way.

I do believe that our erstwhile PM #OhNoBoJo has taken to sleeping in a hedgerow.

Nadine Dorries defects to Reform, saying Conservative party ‘is dead’ Former cabinet minister’s move on eve of Reform conference is further boost for party that took almost £1m in donations from ex-Tory donors

Frankly I had more or less forgotten about the existence of Nads. I can only assume that this means she has finally given up on her unrequited lust for #OhNoBoJo. Has her sexual fixation been transferred to #FuckFarage one wonders.

Boris and Carrie Johnson announce birth of fourth child The former PM's wife says the family is

The minimum number of children positively attributable to #OhNoBoJo has now increased by one.

Boris Johnson fans offered £121 handshake and photo op Tickets to hear former prime minister speak in Edinburgh’s Usher Hall cost up to £160 on top of meet-and-greet

How much to slap him. preferably repeatably, with dead, cold, slightly decomposed fist? No photo required.
#OhNoBoJo