"Don't burn bridges, but DO build toll booths."
#PartingWordsOfWisdom @thewoodyshow
https://youtu.be/jQdbrMTxTug
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#PartingWordsOfWisdom
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"Be nice to people on the way up, because you're gonna need witnesses on the way down."
#PartingWordsOfWisdom @thewoodyshow
https://youtu.be/JoNs6mbzDdY
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"When in doubt, just say 'it's a long story' and then walk away."
#PartingWordsOfWisdom @thewoodyshow
https://youtu.be/QQ07SBkiB1E
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"Tonight's regrets are just tomorrow's character development."
#PartingWordsOfWisdom @thewoodyshow
https://youtu.be/TDZy5oTncK8
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"If you haven't found love, don't worry... your soulmate is out there somewhere ghosting somebody."
#PartingWordsOfWisdom @thewoodyshow
https://youtu.be/VK38066fxG0
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"Life is just one big group project with no responsible leader."
#PartingWordsOfWisdom @thewoodyshow
https://youtu.be/OTlK2FvRtS8
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"No matter how much you jiggle or how much you dance, that one last drop ends up in your pants."
#PartingWordsOfWisdom @thewoodyshow
https://youtu.be/8t4gCqD4cS4
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"Keep your friends close and a lot of snacks closer."
#PartingWordsOfWisdom @thewoodyshow
https://youtu.be/TUwt7zSNTRA
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"Rubbing alcohol for outside booboos. Drinking alcohol for inside booboos."
#PartingWordsOfWisdom @thewoodyshow
https://youtu.be/skPeAOj0sBU
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"You cannot hurt an over-thinkers feelings, because they hurt their own feelings."
#PartingWordsOfWisdom @thewoodyshow
https://youtu.be/44melh9YqMs
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"Never burn bridges unless you're being chased."
#PartingWordsOfWisdom @thewoodyshow
https://youtu.be/sJ0pFfNAJIg
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"You WILL make it through another day today without using a2+b2=c2."
#PartingWordsOfWisdom @thewoodyshow
https://youtu.be/y83hlmxPHJA
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"Screw looking 20, it's all about feeling 20."
#PartingWordsOfWisdom @thewoodyshow
https://youtu.be/VuupnqG7XIU
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"Don't fear the end; fear the really long and awkward build-up to it."
#PartingWordsOfWisdom @thewoodyshow
https://youtu.be/QMnpr3HRP98
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"Some people aren't rude, they're just selectively nice, and you weren't selected."
#PartingWordsOfWisdom @thewoodyshow
https://youtu.be/FjFcAnNxttw
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"Posting pictures of your kid on the first day of school is cool, but you know what's cooler? Not having kids."
#PartingWordsOfWisdom @thewoodyshow
https://youtu.be/vtA3onvoaZo
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"Good things come to those that wait, but bad things come a lot faster."
#PartingWordsOfWisdom @thewoodyshow
https://youtu.be/0e6OrAHvOwg
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"Happiness is temporary, but so is misery, so try to just enjoy the whiplash."
#PartingWordsOfWisdom @thewoodyshow
https://youtu.be/t7msDY4LiOA
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"The worst time to have a heart attack is during a game of charades."
#PartingWordsOfWisdom @thewoodyshow
https://youtu.be/ZwNIxJJkBo8
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"Sometimes hope feels like disappointment on layaway."
#PartingWordsOfWisdom @thewoodyshow
https://youtu.be/uf62yVn580Y
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"Hard work eventually pays off in somebody else's paycheck."
#PartingWordsOfWisdom @thewoodyshow
https://youtu.be/_snI0sAhtD0
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"Honesty is always the best policy, except during a job interview."
#PartingWordsOfWisdom @thewoodyshow
https://youtu.be/wXyglIDCjZ4
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"Life is like a jalapeño: what you do today could burn your ass tomorrow."
#PartingWordsOfWisdom @thewoodyshow
https://youtu.be/NGKyiAe13V8
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"If you can't be kind, at least be vague."
#PartingWordsOfWisdom @thewoodyshow
https://youtu.be/bdxJptfURq8
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"Whatever you do, always give 100%... Unless you're donating blood."
#PartingWordsOfWisdom @thewoodyshow
https://youtu.be/928yfgW37KU
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"Normal is just a setting on a dryer."
#PartingWordsOfWisdom @thewoodyshow
https://youtu.be/6YiuiDXoPqU
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"If cauliflower can become pizza crust, you can do just about anything."
#PartingWordsOfWisdom @thewoodyshow
https://youtu.be/619nJuorGMs
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"Give the gift of absence to people who don't appreciate your presence."
#PartingWordsOfWisdom @thewoodyshow
https://youtu.be/nIAGI8Ym0EI
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"When you think that the world doesn't care, and the world doesn't care, just miss a few car payments."
#PartingWordsOfWisdom @thewoodyshow
https://youtu.be/nE41yVpGYH0
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"Saying have a nice day is totally normal, but saying enjoy the next 24 hours is vaguely threatening."
#PartingWordsOfWisdom @thewoodyshow
https://youtu.be/Y_rznb_wZ4Y
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