i loved doomed narratives and love but with a twist so bad. raon is complicated because both onion and g'raha are trapped in this idea of a narrative, of a hero's tale, that it blurs the intentions and emotions they have for each other and what is "genuine" and "true" or not. especially when both of them struggle deeply with their identities and aren't really sure where their persons start or end and how much of their emotions and thoughts they're comfortable as claiming as their own. onion and g'raha do care for each other deeply but like, in a doomed way. doomed to love one another, doomed to be intertwined in the wol's story
thinking about the part in ultima thule where you're talking to g'raha and he asks whether he'll be a footnote in the wol's story or if he'll be right there and you can quite literally entertain him and go along with his talk about stories and narratives and whatnot.
g'raha, onion is not trapped here with you, you're trapped here with HER
g'raha waking up in the middle of the night and seeing onion sitting at the edge of the bed and calling her name but when she turns around it turns out its esteem. he's a tiny spooked but is otherwise friendly and greets them. esteem who is all no fun no bullshit cuts straight to the chase and goes "do you think you're helping her? the way you act and talk." and g'raha is like wdym 🥴 and esteem calls him out for how much he idolizes onion and insists upon this metaphorical (real, it actually is pretty real) narrative, and at the bottom line esteem is like "i think you need to act like you're your own person for a damn change." and things sorta.. click after that
esteem is raons #1 hater and wingman
onion doesn't know what she feels about g'raha, isn't really sure how to differentiate or identify her emotions because they're not very clear cut. but she does recognize the most prevailing emotion is she cares for the guy (despite the odd feeling here and there of wanting to bully him into oblivion) and is willing to try. g'raha has to learn to stop putting people on pedestals, especially when the figures he's spent centuries reading about are actually here in the flesh. like they're people and he's experiencing what they're like beyond the pages, has to sit with HIS feelings and see how much of his infatuation with onion is mixed into the whole hero thing and how much of it is just like, its own thing (tough answer. he cant separate the two, the hero stuff will always play a part in it BUT he is learning to interact with reality beyond its pages and has come to see his idols as more than just fantastical heroes)
my doomed by the narrative wolgraha #onyandip