#pickuplinelife

Another day sitting in the school pickup line feeling bitter and snarky. Do y'all remember @Dadpression on Twitter, back before the Nazis took it from us? Those were the days. #pickuplinelife

Good news! No bus cancellations today! The pickup line should be super smoo-- Hey, why are there two suns?

#poland #pickuplinelife

Hello. I know you probably weren't hoping for an update to my rant yesterday, but you're going to get one: Why on God's poor dying earth is this news delivered as if it's not a major problem? Class starts at 0800. How many parents had to call in late to handle this shit? #pickuplinelife

(6/6) tl;dr: "Get wrecked, parents! Why? None of your goddamned business!"

#pickuplinelife