<—— girl who’s made of slime and goo

#yuck!

Feeling eurghy.

Eurgh.

I keep getting jump scared by bald men

Gamers Xing (like xbox) #Pax #East

Nothing better than chicken and rice. Other than guys. Yup #PaxEast #Single

I wish there was like an app for everything, where you could talk to a really cool AI.

Will Smith just slapped Chris Rock! #CurrentEvents #BreakingNews #

I watch TikTok the way the lord intended: on someone else’s phone when I stand next to them on the T

Both the Bible and Fortnite have chapters. #ChristianGamer #Fortnite @TheFaithSheriff

Great to hear! We women have to stick together #SingleDad

Just hit a flow state, I was sketching a tree and a Bruce Springsteen song came on the radio, while I had sweet potatoes roasting in the oven. Life is good

Everyday I am tormented by socks that slide down in my boots

In the bathroom with Lady Poop Fartington III right now

I'm just waiting for the Red Sox to make the world series. #IBleedRed #RedOx #SingleMom

Just had the best apple ever. You all wish you were me

In the club globing it, you know what I mean #GlobingIt

If there’s a Guinness World Record for number of farts in a lifetime, I think I’m about to break it. #gassylassie

Women be like "can we get ramen for dinner?"

Women love sushi. Japanese resturants have too much fish, ya know

Life is procedurally generated

It’s just me and my reusable bags against the world #mybags

Themsgiving

Just played God of War Ragnarok and that game RagnaROCKS. @ign.com hire me!
#lol #gow #puns

Had the best smoothie of my life, but unfortunately I can never buy it again, as it was ten dollars. Oh well *adjusts my beret and takes a drag off my cigarette* such is life.

College is a dungeon crawler

She jack on my lantern until I pumpkin

Hey women! I'm on your side. #ForthWave

They don’t let white girls derp around anymore. Because of woke.