Dam... I thought I was losing it but now it is lost

bsky.app/profile/reut...
Who would have imagined a mechanical device could go faster than a human?

My wife just passed her driving test and asked me to buy her something cheap to run around in. So I bought her a pair of trainers from Lidl.

As an agnostic, I concur.

Artemis 2 was the furthest human voyage from Earth. Per the final JPL Horizons trajectory I estimate the max distance from the geocenter was 413145 km at 2304 UTC Apr 6 (about 4 km less and 1 min later than PAO's report at the time). (1 / n ).....

‘Blasphemy’: outrage after Trump posts AI image of himself as Christ-like figure The US president’s conservative, Christian supporters decried the Truth Social post, calling it ‘disgusting’ Just months after signing legislation that will pull nearly 12 million Americans off health insurance by gutting Medicaid, Donald Trump posted an AI-generated image of himself to Truth Social on Sunday depicting him as a Jesus Christ-like figure, with divine light emanating from his hands as he heals a stricken man in a hospital bed with a demon from hell floating in the background. Some of his most high-profile and loyal Christian supporters, many of whom have stood by the president through multiple other indiscretions, are unable to contain their righteous fury. Continue reading...

‘Blasphemy’: outrage after Trump posts AI image of himself as Christ-like figure

D - and Y

A horse walks into a bar.

"Why the long face?" asks the barman.

"Your lungs hold around 5 litres" replies the horse. "Mine hold 50. I can breathe in almost two THOUSAND litres of air a minute. Big lungs need big noses and big mouths, which need long faces. Centaurs? They'd fucking suffocate, mate"

The Royal Navy’s Inflatable Warships: Game-Changing Tech or Just Hot Air? Enjoy the videos and music you love, upload original content, and share it all with friends, family, and the world on YouTube.

Source: YouTube share.google/us5Y1lkZke33...
Incredible, but should we be revealing this game changing secret at this delicate time?

...and you will arrive at your intended destination along with your luggage

If there’s a better commentator out there on US politics than Ed Luce I’d like to see it, here’s his column today

www.ft.com/content/2656...

Strange situation where we await a statement from Iran to check whether there's any truth to what US president is saying.

@jakevig.bsky.social Unbelievable first us UKers now this...

Google Has a Secret Reference Desk. Here's How to Use It. 40 Google features to find exactly what you need, the alternative search engines that do things Google won't, and the reference desk framework underneath all of it.

This is a great list of techniques for getting real information out of a Google search and avoiding AI slop and paid results.
(One thing not included is that if you add "-ai" to a search, you block the AI summary) cardcatalogforlife.substack.com/p/google-has...

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WHITE HOUSE: All other countries suck and we don't need them for anything. In fact, here are some more tariffs. We are strong and awesome and can do everything alone. That being said, we desperately need every other country's help, and demand that they clean up the illegal war that we started.

Oh my God. What an absolute fiasco

It's like being asked: have you stopped beating your wife. Yes or no

That comment didn't age very well

An American tourist has just complained about our Sushi Bar. He said the portions were reasonable, but they were incredibly hard to chew. I had to tell him he was at a luggage carousel.

I just bought some binoculars from a shop that specialised in binoculars. They are good but they charged me a fortune for them.
They must have seen me coming.
#lunchpun

This just about sums it up:
In the US, "natural gas" is the standard term for the methane-based fuel used for heating and cooking. It is commonly referred to simply as gas, but it is distinct from "gas" used for cars (which is gasoline).

Whenever I left a door open, my mum would ask if I was born in a barn, which is odd because you'd think she'd remember something like that.

The aircraft carrying the Bermuda National Orchestra has just landed. They can’t find the bloke who plays the Triangle.

Rod Stuart the killing of Georgie. I can't stop humming it now

And where was the US support when we were fighting an invasion on their other side of the planet in the Falklands? They wouldn't even let us stop in the US for supplies and refuelling!

If any Americans wonder why people in the U.K. suppress a giggle when 'President Trump' is announced or introduced, here's why...

Christian Ronaldo's private jet, after being slightly touched while refuelling.

Earlier today, I heard a woman on some radio phone-in say that men are incapable of changing. Well, I recently watched a box set of The Incredible Hulk, and he does it literally every episode. Often two or three times.

Talking out of her arse.

When Norfolk Police ask Andrew Mountbatten-Windsor if he has any special dietary requirements whilst in custody: