Six state and local election results you should know about, before we call it quits for the night.

Let's go. 🧵

KINDA

Secret date reveal... Jazz night at a cat lounge.

lying about it happening on april fool's day: mean-spirited, hurtful, not funny at all

it actually happening on april fool's day: possibly the funniest thing of all time

(Yes, it's real. Found in Brazil and reported by multiple sources in 2021. This message brought to you by how annoying it is that one has to include an AI disclaimer with any cool thing. And the letter C.)

Encouraging kids to be their authentic selves is suicide prevention.

Conversion therapy is a death sentence.

It’s time we all get clear on that.

Federal Judge Approves Trump Effort to Obtain List of Jews From Penn

Excuse me, what did you just say? WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU JUST SAY???

www.nytimes.com/2026/03/31/u...

A pair of Boston Red Sox socks that are GREEN (because they're from the "Fenway Collection" and those are the colors of Fenway Park)

You had ONE JOB

Might be the greatest opening paragraph of anything ever.

You need to see baby goat zoomies. Trust me. Sound up.

A single gallon of gas is approaching the price it costs me to charge my EV once a week.

That’s just my two cents.

When Democrats accuse Trump of a crime, it's because he actually did it.

When Trump falsely accuses Democrats of a crime, it's because he actually did it.

Pulitzer-worthy

It’s real. I checked.

A few weeks ago, I put a secret date on our calendar. Super excited about this cool thing I found & a great spot right around the corner for dinner beforehand. Except I just spent an hour desperately trying to remember what it was. The cool secret date I'd planned. That I didn't write down. 🧠

the human body was not designed to know what the worst person in the world is doing every fifteen minutes

And the award goes to Walter 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

@WutTheWut.bsky.social

MEEEEE TOOOOOOO.

Went EV in 2015, and I'm never going back.

Happy #Caturday, video of the week.

A vicious attack kitten and the most patient dog ever.

I read the NYT piece, and I am holding onto the words of a woman who fended off inappropriate advances from a 60-year-old Cesar Chavez at the age of 19. “It makes you rethink in history all those heroes,” Esmeralda Lopez said. “The movement — that’s the hero.”

Re Chavez:
Thread for sexual assault survivors/victims (however you see yourself is ok!) and people supporting them today.

Here are some things that I think are useful. I am not an expert, just someone who has been navigating being public about my experiences, including in media interviews. 🧵

FIRST WOMAN TO EVER WIN BEST CINEMATOGRAPHY. FIRST BLACK PERSON TO WIN BEST CINEMATOGRAPHY. FIRST FILIPINA TO WIN BEST CINEMATOGRAPHY. ACADEMY AWARD WINNER AUTUMN DURALD ARKAPAW.

Want to help stop David Ellison from destroying the kind of movie studio that would greenlight Sinners, One Battle After Another, and Weapons? #filmsky 📽 #Oscars blockthemerger.com

‘Mr. Nobody Against Putin’ Director: “This is about how you lose your country — through small acts of complicity: when a government murders people on the streets, when oligarchs take over the media… we all face a moral choice. But even a nobody is more powerful than you think."

Exactly like electricity or water, if we all generated our own electricity and water and the version he wanted to sell us was made of guano

On a complete side note, it was so nice to hear your voice here!

I WAS on Good Times, but I've had a temporary layoff.