#FakeSpringFacts they are safer than elastomeric bushings
#FakeSpringFacts time to plant your finger bones for October skeletons
#FakeSpringFacts All the women get together and dress in their most Unrevealing muumuus and topcoats then dance around a Snowman thus saying goodbye to winter.
#FakeSpringFacts it's like there's a party in my nasal passages
It's winter for Poland and France
#FakeSpringFacts
It's the curry or hot pepper of seasons
#FakeSpringFacts
Those animals are just giving each other piggy-back rides
#FakeSpringFacts
The best noisemaker when you’re a kid #FakeSpringFacts
It gets warm and dry and stays that way
#FakeSpringFacts
It never inspires any hashtags
#FakeSpringFacts
Wind chimes keep the gnomes away. #FakeSpringFacts
#FakeSpringFacts
The 'springboard' was invented in the Spring of 1899 in Hot Springs, Arkansas...
#FakeSpringFacts
Tigger and Eeyore were really one character in different phases of a mood disorder.
The founder of the food delivery franchise "Just Eat" was previously a renowned lepidopterist. He was inspired to open his new venture following a question at one of his lectures about what it is that caterpillars do.
#FakeSpringFacts
#FakeSpringFacts
It was known as 'Slinky Season' before the ancient Greeks renamed it Spring...
#FakeSpringFacts
Recently sightings of a Tigger in the desert have been debunked by locals who discovered and rescued a coyote in an A.C.M.E. bumblebee costume from whose...let's say rear orifice veterinarians have also removed a giant A.C.M.E. spring.
#FakeSpringFacts Jelly beans and Peeps must be planted deep in the ground after the last frost in order to completely not have them around until next year.
#FakeSpringFacts hay fever can be cured by soaking the hay in alcohol and then drinking the alcohol...preferably whiskey.
@caffeineandhate.bsky.social
#FakeSpringFacts
The May Pole celebration was originally the holy anal rail gun celebration.
At the spring equinox, the rotation of the flat Earth reduces from 45rpm (revolutions led month) to 33.3rpm.
#FakeSpringFacts
#FakeSpringFacts
😺👉 Spring is when cats spring into action
Maine's vaunted "Poland Spring" water is 100% recycled sewer water, like this GIF says¹!
#FakeSpringFacts
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1.👩🔬:don't get us sued!!!—👩:🤷♀️
In early spring, people gather outside a remote badger sett in Surrey to watch Brian May emerge. If he does not immediately return inside, the spectators know if it safe to remove their cardigans.
#FakeSpringFacts
#FakeSpringFacts if you show this Sticker to your spouse, significant other, or crush, that person will undress immediately. Then you’ll have the best sex of your life.
I’m not lying.
#FakeSpringFacts
Only springs manufactures in Spring are officially springs. All others are technically and legally recognized as "bouncy-twisty bits"
Men aren’t staring at women’s chests #FakeSpringFacts
In spring, the weather can change so often that it can cause epileptic seizures.
#FakeSpringFacts
Best 4 days in Canada. That’s a lie. It’s 3
#FakeSpringFacts
In Tudor England people believed that tadpoles were the reincarnated souls of Spanish swordsman that had been killed in wars against the English Crown
#FakeSpringFacts
If Blossom sees her shadow, it's six more weeks of spring
#FakeSpringFacts