Advertisement · 728 × 90
#
Hashtag
#LHprogress
Advertisement · 728 × 90
 Page 1: (5 Panels)
Panel 1 –  Establishing the scene is the Tantalus Hill. It is an island in a dried out lakebed, on a hill of some size. 
The area is actually a dried out former island. The soil around the hill looking like it is parched and muddy. 
There is a giant gashadokuro skull and other scattered bones around the island, but the giant tree is the point of 
interest. There is a bridge that leads to the island, where our protagonists enter from.

Panel 2 – This panel shows the far end of the bridge. A figure is shown riding in, following a light ahead of 
them. This is a distant look at the cast

Panel 3 – Closer up, a visual of Ardan in Nyx’s body is seen riding atop a much larger Gnash. The giant wolfdog 
is running at full sprint, following the light (Willow) guiding them.

Panel 4 – Gnash is shown skidding to a halt on the soil of the hill, right where the bridge stops. Dust is kicked 
up. It also juxtaposes their size to the massive tree.

Panel 5 – From behind, Ardan is shown leaping off of Gnash’s back.  A bottle of Wax (a container for Willow’s 
body) attached to his hip sways.

Ardan
So, this is Tantalus Hill?

Willow
Yep, and our ticket to the next island is right up there.

Page 1: (5 Panels) Panel 1 – Establishing the scene is the Tantalus Hill. It is an island in a dried out lakebed, on a hill of some size. The area is actually a dried out former island. The soil around the hill looking like it is parched and muddy. There is a giant gashadokuro skull and other scattered bones around the island, but the giant tree is the point of interest. There is a bridge that leads to the island, where our protagonists enter from. Panel 2 – This panel shows the far end of the bridge. A figure is shown riding in, following a light ahead of them. This is a distant look at the cast Panel 3 – Closer up, a visual of Ardan in Nyx’s body is seen riding atop a much larger Gnash. The giant wolfdog is running at full sprint, following the light (Willow) guiding them. Panel 4 – Gnash is shown skidding to a halt on the soil of the hill, right where the bridge stops. Dust is kicked up. It also juxtaposes their size to the massive tree. Panel 5 – From behind, Ardan is shown leaping off of Gnash’s back. A bottle of Wax (a container for Willow’s body) attached to his hip sways. Ardan So, this is Tantalus Hill? Willow Yep, and our ticket to the next island is right up there.

Page 2: (7 Panels)

Panel 1 – Full view of Ardan looking up. Willow floats by him still as a will o’ wisp. The bottle on his hip 
swaying in her direction.

Ardan
Good. Sooner we get to the fun, the better.

Willow
For once I agree with you, but I’m picking up some strong presences.

Panel 2 – Ardan turns his head to look towards Willow and smiles.

Ardan
C’mon, Willow. You already know we’ve got this.
Besides, I’m itchin’ for some exerci- 

Panel 3 – Interrupted, Ardan turns his head back towards the bridge.

Employer
H-hold a moment!
Wait for me!

Panel 4 – Riding in on a skeletal horse is a skeleton dressed a bit poshly. He’s a fancy, if foolish fellow, looking 
a bit exasperated. His horse is trotting on.

Employer
I admire your gusto, but I think you accidentally left me behind. 

Panel 5 – Ardan is shown turned to face the skeleton as he and his horse stop in front of them. He’s less than 
amused while the skeleton seems a bit pompous. If Gnash is in panel he should also look a bit unhappy.

Ardan
Whoops. My bad, honest.

Employer
All is forgiven. Accidents happen! I simply wished to witness the acquisition of the Tantalus Fruit! 
As much as you’re charging me, I figured I’d get the full show.

Panel 6 – Willow’s bottle is shown with the ink flowing out from it to her flame. This is set up for her reveal 
next panel.
Willow (off panel))
In our defense, you’re not asking for a walk in the park.

Panel 7 – Willow is fully revealed, a smug look on hher face. She floats surrounded by an aura similar to her 
flame.

Willow
Besides, as annoying as Ardan can be, he’s earned his rep for a reason

Page 2: (7 Panels) Panel 1 – Full view of Ardan looking up. Willow floats by him still as a will o’ wisp. The bottle on his hip swaying in her direction. Ardan Good. Sooner we get to the fun, the better. Willow For once I agree with you, but I’m picking up some strong presences. Panel 2 – Ardan turns his head to look towards Willow and smiles. Ardan C’mon, Willow. You already know we’ve got this. Besides, I’m itchin’ for some exerci- Panel 3 – Interrupted, Ardan turns his head back towards the bridge. Employer H-hold a moment! Wait for me! Panel 4 – Riding in on a skeletal horse is a skeleton dressed a bit poshly. He’s a fancy, if foolish fellow, looking a bit exasperated. His horse is trotting on. Employer I admire your gusto, but I think you accidentally left me behind. Panel 5 – Ardan is shown turned to face the skeleton as he and his horse stop in front of them. He’s less than amused while the skeleton seems a bit pompous. If Gnash is in panel he should also look a bit unhappy. Ardan Whoops. My bad, honest. Employer All is forgiven. Accidents happen! I simply wished to witness the acquisition of the Tantalus Fruit! As much as you’re charging me, I figured I’d get the full show. Panel 6 – Willow’s bottle is shown with the ink flowing out from it to her flame. This is set up for her reveal next panel. Willow (off panel)) In our defense, you’re not asking for a walk in the park. Panel 7 – Willow is fully revealed, a smug look on hher face. She floats surrounded by an aura similar to her flame. Willow Besides, as annoying as Ardan can be, he’s earned his rep for a reason

Page 3: (6 Panels)

Panel 1 – Ardan is shown walking towards the island, drawing his sword and smiling. He looks excited to get to 
work as the others watch. Willow is the only one to faintly follow him while Gnash remains by the Employer, 
who looks a bit nervous next to the massive Fetch.

Ardan
Thanks. You know how to give a fella the warm fuzzies.
Gnash, stick close to our guest. Willow, you keep your eyes peeled and let me and the kid go to town.

Panel 2 – The Employer gives a confused look.
Employer
“The Kid”?
Odd name for a sword.

Panel 3 – Willow turns her head and waves a hand dismissively.
Willow
Never mind him. Just stay back and have our payment ready.

Panel 4 – Big image of several darker skeletons covered in aura rise up from the earth. All of them carrying 
rusted or damaged weapons of some kind. One in the foreground is seen holding a spear.

Panel 5 – The spear wielding skeleton is shown lunging at Ardan, a trail of dirt and aura following him. Ardan’s 
smiling, his weapon at ready.

Panel 6 – Ardan’s shown obliterating the attacking skeleton with a single sword strike. A trail of fire rendering it 
as ash.

Willow (off panel)
Til then, let’s enjoy the fireworks.

Page 3: (6 Panels) Panel 1 – Ardan is shown walking towards the island, drawing his sword and smiling. He looks excited to get to work as the others watch. Willow is the only one to faintly follow him while Gnash remains by the Employer, who looks a bit nervous next to the massive Fetch. Ardan Thanks. You know how to give a fella the warm fuzzies. Gnash, stick close to our guest. Willow, you keep your eyes peeled and let me and the kid go to town. Panel 2 – The Employer gives a confused look. Employer “The Kid”? Odd name for a sword. Panel 3 – Willow turns her head and waves a hand dismissively. Willow Never mind him. Just stay back and have our payment ready. Panel 4 – Big image of several darker skeletons covered in aura rise up from the earth. All of them carrying rusted or damaged weapons of some kind. One in the foreground is seen holding a spear. Panel 5 – The spear wielding skeleton is shown lunging at Ardan, a trail of dirt and aura following him. Ardan’s smiling, his weapon at ready. Panel 6 – Ardan’s shown obliterating the attacking skeleton with a single sword strike. A trail of fire rendering it as ash. Willow (off panel) Til then, let’s enjoy the fireworks.

Page 4: (5 Panels)

Panel 1 – Ardan is shown fighting a horde of skeletons surrounded by dark aura, enjoying himself fully. The 
ashes of the skeleton he just defeated ar behind him while he dodges an oncoming attack, smirking all the while.

Panel 2 – Ardan is shown with a forward stab, defeating three enemies at once. Their bones are shown cracking 
and weapons breaking due to the force.

Panel 3 – Ardan is shown noticing three skeletons about to ambush him from behind. All are approaching 
rapidly.

Panel 4 – Ardan is shown doing a full spin slash, a gust of cinders and ash on the wind shown as he dispatches 
all around him

Panel 5 – The Employer and Willow watch on. The Employer looks impressed while Willow’s a bit more bored. 
She’s used to Ardan and not particularly a fan of his rowdiness.

Employer
My! I’d be appalled, but perhaps this is a mercy for those soulless bones.

Willow
Well, none of them have a spark of life so it really doesn’t matter.
Count yourself lucky it’ll only cost you a few coins to get what they gave their minds up for.

Page 4: (5 Panels) Panel 1 – Ardan is shown fighting a horde of skeletons surrounded by dark aura, enjoying himself fully. The ashes of the skeleton he just defeated ar behind him while he dodges an oncoming attack, smirking all the while. Panel 2 – Ardan is shown with a forward stab, defeating three enemies at once. Their bones are shown cracking and weapons breaking due to the force. Panel 3 – Ardan is shown noticing three skeletons about to ambush him from behind. All are approaching rapidly. Panel 4 – Ardan is shown doing a full spin slash, a gust of cinders and ash on the wind shown as he dispatches all around him Panel 5 – The Employer and Willow watch on. The Employer looks impressed while Willow’s a bit more bored. She’s used to Ardan and not particularly a fan of his rowdiness. Employer My! I’d be appalled, but perhaps this is a mercy for those soulless bones. Willow Well, none of them have a spark of life so it really doesn’t matter. Count yourself lucky it’ll only cost you a few coins to get what they gave their minds up for.

#Arisan #LHProgress

Before the kickstarter, I worked on creating a small encapsulation of Arisan's spectacle. A sort of adventure to set tone and get into action.

The focus here was showing off Ardan's heavy hitting nature.

Page 3 is mislabeled sadly. It's 6 panels, not 5, but mistakes happen.

8 0 0 0

Little by little, Famish sets in motion.
So much to try, a chewing commotion.
A feast for the eyes, devour all in reach.
To taste life's pleasures, every and each.

(little more progress)

#Arisan #LHprogress

Art by: @knighthearts.bsky.social
Animated by: @ferdon10.bsky.social

31 13 0 0
Video

"Look Alive. An Arisan update is comin' your way."

#Arisan #LHprogress

Art by: @knighthearts.bsky.social
Animated by: @ferdon10.bsky.social

76 34 3 1
A massive creature of many mouths and eyes. It seems pretty big and pretty gross.

A massive creature of many mouths and eyes. It seems pretty big and pretty gross.

"Who's THAT Pokemon?!" (art by the ever talented @knighthearts.bsky.social )

Might have the wrong series, but I always wanted to say that.

You guys should get a chance to see more of this fella soon.

#Arisan #LHProgress

13 7 1 0

Must...keep...going...
(@knighthearts.bsky.social made this little doodle btw)

#Arisan #LHProgress

19 7 0 0
Art by Knighthearts of Nyx (smiling young man, has a headband. His eyes have massive bags), "Lighthouse" (flaming skull with a scar), and Gnash (a supernatural black hound. Scruffy and friendly).

Art by Knighthearts of Nyx (smiling young man, has a headband. His eyes have massive bags), "Lighthouse" (flaming skull with a scar), and Gnash (a supernatural black hound. Scruffy and friendly).

Lovely art by @knighthearts.bsky.social

Nyx, "Lighthouse" , and Gnash from Arisan are all here.

While I work on hammering out details for their teammate, any questions about these three? #Arisan #LHProgress

37 15 1 0

#Arisan #LHProgress

It's been long enough, so I suppose I'm ready to share again.

Mutuals, if there's anyone who is willing to read the second draft of Arisan for feedback before I progress, comment below. I want to get some final impressions before I move on to the sketch phase.

8 1 0 0

#Arisan #LHProgress

The Draft #2 is done.

Added a few scenes. Cleaned up some dialogue, cut what felt superfluous, and added detail where I felt it would help.

There were some small lore tweaks as well, but I'm mostly satisfied.

I'll get one more check from folks I trust and move on.

32 7 4 3
Image of Nyx, a dark skinned young man with ash gray hair and a dark brown cloak. His outfit is brown and gold while there's a circle showing him with blue eyes. He has bags and hints of yellowing in his eyes. The background is gray. His headband and cloak fade into dust and ash.

Image of Nyx, a dark skinned young man with ash gray hair and a dark brown cloak. His outfit is brown and gold while there's a circle showing him with blue eyes. He has bags and hints of yellowing in his eyes. The background is gray. His headband and cloak fade into dust and ash.

@scourgefrontiers.bsky.social being incredible, kind, & incredibly kind and designed Nyx, the protagonist for Arisan.

This is our first look at him as his journey goes on. We'll see more of the magic he has & the people who teach him to cherish life in the land of the departed.

#Arisan #LHProgress

150 34 4 0

Some solid feedback on the script so far.

Gonna wait for a few more before I start to implement what I've gotten for a version 2 and see how folks respond to that. It'll likely be a week before that's ready when I begin.

#Arisan #LHProgress

11 0 0 0
Title image reading "Arisan" depicting a character on a gray beach looking  out into the water. There's a blue spiral in the sky surrounded by a curious outline. There are floating islands connected by water, and a ferry approaching a lone figure on a desolate beach.

Title image reading "Arisan" depicting a character on a gray beach looking out into the water. There's a blue spiral in the sky surrounded by a curious outline. There are floating islands connected by water, and a ferry approaching a lone figure on a desolate beach.

@frogletcomics.bsky.social has graced my project with their art. Thank you again for always having my back.

A little teaser while this tale continues to unfold.

#Arisan #LHProgress

75 24 2 0

Anyone with the time or interest to beta read my new project or give feedback, please comment. I'll be in contact if it works out.

Tagline: A young man must journey home when he awakens in the land of the dead, and find something to live for on the way.

Genre: Fantasy Action

#Arisan #LHProgress

10 3 1 0
Word Count

99 Pages

12,425 Words

Etc.

Word Count 99 Pages 12,425 Words Etc.

Draft #1 is done. This is the oneshot version while I get stuff planned.

Right now, I need sleep. 70 pages. I'll get up with folks I need to who're interested. Thanks, y'all.

#LHProgress #Arisan

4 0 1 1

#Arisan #LHProgress

10,000 words, 53 pages (so far)

Not bad for 24 hours work.

8 0 1 0
Word Count

56 Pages

7339 Words

Etc.

Word Count 56 Pages 7339 Words Etc.

36 now.

#Arisan #LHProgress

3 0 1 0

#Arisan #LHProgress

21 actual scripted pages in one day.

I'll be honest, I was hoping I'd get further, but I got distracted and this is a marathon. Gotta remind myself of that.

For folks who are mutuals and curious I'll share later if anyone wants.

14 1 3 0

15 pages in on the draft.

Gonna keep going. See if I can get to a satisfying stopping point before I share with folks I trust.

#Arisan

#LHProgress

2 0 0 0
ARISAN: Draft Concept
Example Draft
Final Page Count:
Final Chapter Count:
Writer: Lorenzo Antonio Hall
Artist: TBD

ARISAN: Draft Concept Example Draft Final Page Count: Final Chapter Count: Writer: Lorenzo Antonio Hall Artist: TBD

Somewhere else, a blue sun sets. Stagnant waves rub against a shore of jet black sand.

A lone figure stands upon the shore, unsteady, unsure of himself. A single coin clasped tightly in his palm. As he waits, his fingers trace the etched circle of metal. The face once engraved upon it polished smooth, a visage lost to time and memory, as is the way of all.

Upon the water, a single figure approaches, the cyan blaze to their back. Slow, with practiced precision, the seafarer approaches. Used to traversing the sea of tears, long used to ghastly reflections upon its surface and the abyss of oblivion below.

Minutes pass, until the ferryman is near the shore. Wordlessly, he holds out a hand, eyes expectant as he looks at the voyager.

With trepidation, the lonely figure upon the beach hands over the object, if only to exchange it for something he values more.

'Going deeper in, are we?' the ferryman asks.

The visitor of the shore shakes his head, pointing to the sun on the horizon. He clenches his fist that once held the coin, certain of his life, and the way to reclaim what was lost.

Somewhere else, a blue sun sets. Stagnant waves rub against a shore of jet black sand. A lone figure stands upon the shore, unsteady, unsure of himself. A single coin clasped tightly in his palm. As he waits, his fingers trace the etched circle of metal. The face once engraved upon it polished smooth, a visage lost to time and memory, as is the way of all. Upon the water, a single figure approaches, the cyan blaze to their back. Slow, with practiced precision, the seafarer approaches. Used to traversing the sea of tears, long used to ghastly reflections upon its surface and the abyss of oblivion below. Minutes pass, until the ferryman is near the shore. Wordlessly, he holds out a hand, eyes expectant as he looks at the voyager. With trepidation, the lonely figure upon the beach hands over the object, if only to exchange it for something he values more. 'Going deeper in, are we?' the ferryman asks. The visitor of the shore shakes his head, pointing to the sun on the horizon. He clenches his fist that once held the coin, certain of his life, and the way to reclaim what was lost.

Time to get started. New project and progress thread.

#Arisan

#LHProgress

17 9 3 3