Here’s the route and strategies I perfected over 4 years — super efficient, kid-friendly, and zero wasted time 👇
#WinterWonderland #LondonChristmas #FamilyTrip #KidFriendlyLondon
#SantaLand #MagicIceKingdom #ZipposCircus #RealIceSlide
#LondonLife
The Magical Return of SNOWDAY: A Holiday Adventure at Galleria Dallas #USA #Dallas #Galleria_Dallas #SNOWDAY #SANTALAND
Today’s trivia question is about everybody’s well known favorite Disney song. #Trivia time #It’sASmallWorld #SantaLand. #Disney70 #WaltDisney 
🎄 #christmasporn 🎄 #santaland 🎄 #animation 🎄 #sexysanta 🎄 #santa 🎄 #naked 🎄 #boobs 🎄 #tits 🎄 #nipples 🎄 #cleavage 🎄 #busty 🎄 #ass 🎄 #lesbian 🎄 #girlgirl 🎄 #ff 🎄 #legs 🎄 #feet 🎄 #blonde 🎄 #christmasdecorations 🎄 #candycane 🎄 #dildo 🎄 #christmasstocking
A yard full of Santa’s
Last night, before he began his travels. Wishing all a peaceful holiday season of recharging and renewal! #santaland
Santaland Theme Park, Riga Latvia. Closed since 1994, famous for the Christmas Eve roller coaster where you're flying Santa's Sleigh!
Santaland Theme Park, Riga Latvia. Closed since 1994, famous for the Christmas Eve roller coaster where you're flying Santa's Sleigh!
Santaland Theme Park, Riga Latvia. Closed since 1994, famous for the Christmas Eve roller coaster where you're flying Santa's Sleigh!
#aiart #aiartcommunity #forgottenplaces #abandoned #urbex #urbandecay #rollercoaster #christmas #santaland
🎅 Watched a grown man sneeze directly into the open mouth of his small child.
Gotta mix it up from time to time I suppose.
#santaland
Omg it’s back! #TCMParty
#Santaland 😱
🎅 Preteen fans out a few hundred dollars in 20s in his hands to hold up in his Santa photo.
#santaland
🎅 Santa: And what do you want for Christmas?
Young Kid: An AK-47.
Santa: I don't think I can help you with that. What's your second choice?
Kid: A Glock.
#santaland
🎅 I thought that guy had some kind of gun harness on, but it turned out to just be a really intense pair of suspenders.
#santaland
🎅 One of my employees asks me, without preamble: "Do you think it would be like rude to assemble a Lego set at like IHOP while I eat dinner after work tonight?"
#santaland
🎅 a very red-faced and sweaty man high fives me after I got a good shot of his kids. He was very happy and I thought to myself- "What is the most subtle way I could put on some hand sanitizer without him seeing?"
#santaland
🎅 The Irish Travellers who frequent the Santa booth seem to have abandoned the cheetah print which was previously their trademark. It's all about plaids this year.
I didn't get the memo, but I guess I wouldn't.
#Santaland
🎅 Have an elf tonight that's just inexplicably lurking right behind me constantly. Makes me thankful I'm gassy today.
#santaland
🎅 Some of the relationship pairings that come through here really fill me with the urge to see some identification, please.
#santaland
🎅 Santa apologized to me today for being "a whiny little bitch" last night. And while we were Very busy and overwhelmed, I do not recall at any point him being "a whiny little bitch."
#santaland
🎅 Watched a dude get speed-bagged in the testicles by his three year old daughter.
It was delightful, as he was exactly the kind of person you'd like to see get speed-bagged in the testicles.
#santaland
🎅 Santa tells me that girl asked for "a vampire bathroom."
We have follow up questions, but do not have time to ask.
"Maybe it has no mirrors." Opines Santa Claus.
#santaland
🎅 Communication has truly broken down when the child is screaming "CHEESE!" While actively fighting Santa.
#santaland
🎅 That mom is way hipper than her kids. I'm not sure how she raised this glorious gaggle of nerds.
#santaland
🎅 it's pretty swampy today. Santa overheated and almost puked. He has a very special trashcan waiting for him backstage.
Also one of our printers died so fuck me I guess.
#santaland
Another day another glorious session working for Macys #santaland
🎅 For (definitely not) the last time:
Do not refer to a successful photo of your kid with Santa as "the money shot."
#santaland
🎅 SubSanta is reading something on his phone and laughing at a performative volume so I'll ask about it. But I'm not going to.
#santaland
🎅 Perhaps my expectations are the real problem. I can't reasonably say to SubSanta "My regular Santa doesn't blink."
No matter how true it is.
#santaland
🎅 I have to tell myself "Don't make a face" every time SubSanta says or does anything.
I might be the problem?
#santaland
🎅 Substitute Santa. I barely speak when he's here. Does this mean he is the more dominant control freak? Or am I just a better person?
#santaland
🎅 Santa: "I've been doing this 19 years. I've got a lot of 'HO's under my belt."
And I can't convince you that he wasn't trying to make a dirty joke. But he wasn't. He's too pure.
#santaland
Formula 1 season is over. No Dungeons & Dragons til at least January. Not playing any shows til then either. Also no frogs or snakes til Spring.
#Santaland is now my whole personality the next couple of weeks.
