From the mythical Garden of Eden
To the Chalice that Alice peed in
Consecrated to the Potentate
A journalistic pomegranate
By Mammon, god of Money, is the deed done.

— Fyodor's Guide to Sticking With the Question

#blueSkyPoetry #poetry #saintFyodor

You can't fill a gas tank with prayers: Patriarch Kirill Begs Kremlin for Gas can't In stunning display of irony that speaks volumes about the current state of Russia the Russian Orthodox Church (ROC) is reportedly facing severe gasoline shortage. According to sources key

I am especially… active, on activeness.social. Won't you join the #Resistance to #disinformation too?

activeness.social/en/you-cant-... #SaintFyodor #WhyHeNoCome

I'm #SaintFyodor and I approved this message.

Now back to our regularly scheduled programming. All is going according to God's plan.

Lovely Americans,
Please stop talking about corruption in Ukraine, until you get your own house in order.

—Fyodor's Guide to "What is Good for the Gander"
#SaintFyodor

Our Bible is a book inspired
By the failings of others—required!
To judge not our iniquities
Nor our war crimes (we've lots of these)
But bless land and loot, acquired.

- Fyodor's Guide to Dispensation
#SaintFyodor #bibleStudy #ROC #whyHeNoCome #poetry

Priest of the Russian Orthodox Church blessed "Putin's Army" to kill women and children in Ukraine - RISU Russian priests demonstrate their irrepressible thirst for blood. One of the representatives of the Russian Orthodox Church called on soldiers of the Russian army to kill even children and women in Uk...

Now learn about sacred and profane.
The sacred is that which brings gain—
To recruit cannonfodder
And bless holy slaughter.
The profane to the devil pertain.

- #SaintFyodor
#bibleStudy #ROC #whyHeNoCome #poetry

Honoured to be talked about behind my back, in the same sacristy with Prophet Kirk... duly canonised, apple pie jesu domine, donna noble requiem.

#saintFyodor

There was a young lady named Alice
Who spat in a russian chalice
Of a pedophile emperor
Who didn't even remember her
Induction into his cult of malice.
—St. Fyodor's Guide to Deniability
#poetry #twitterBan #saintFyodor

"Martyrdom makes one a household word. For nonbelievers, one becomes the only story, a grand distraction, His plan. Blessed be the Holy Kremlin and Saint Charlie Kirk. Amen."
—Fyodor's Guide to Martyrs

#saintFyodor #whyHeNoCome #NAFO #parody
Today's genuflect goes to: @darthputinkgb.bsky.social

BREAKING: From a Refinery somewhere in holy mother russia:
"The Special Military Operation requires... sacrifices. KADYROOOOOV COME BACK WITH MY GOAT!"
#SaintFyodor is said to be in mourning.

"Blessed are the liberators of washing machines,
For theirs is the cleanliness of the soul."
-Fyodor's Guide to Ablution

#SaintFyodor #whyHeNoCome #victimOfThePutin

It's been a while since we've heard from #SaintFyodor. He's been setting up collection boxes back in Mother Russia, so that Ordinary Russians can support the #SpecialMilitaryOperation* and wipe the heathen from the map, one country at a time.

*HA CVO in russian, for parishioners' conveneince

Even a Saint must add a plug for his sponsors.
-Fyodor's Guide to Social Media
#SaintFyodor #parody #shamelessPlugs #nafoFellas

Ten-twenty-four orc soldiers
Martyred - heart and soul
Relentless in their jealousy,
They never stopped - at all.

-Fyodor's Guide to the Holy Meatgrinder*
*(not sung to the tune of The Yellow Rose of Texas)
#SaintFyodor #poetry #parody

Well, this one Guide aged well... wrote it 4 months before it came out in the mainstream, that orcs eat each other.

#saintFyodor #russianDressing

Saint Fyodor sez:
"Another boy come to JeZus".
Shepherd of the Covenant of Russki Mir performed the rites.
#MOTD #SaintFyodor

"It is our earthly mission to spread the Holy Word. By the Holy Handgrenade of Antioch, with which thou wouldst blow thine enemies to tiny bits (in thy mercy), Amen."

-Fyodor's Guide to the Universe, Chapter 42.
#NAFOworks #inStrangeAndMysteriousWays
#SaintFyodor

#SaintFyodor sez, "Stealing and reposting this meme is just as disrespectful as failing to wear a suit in the White House."
-Fyodor's Guide to Ripping Them a New One

Orthodox Russian Icon: Just a meme within a meme.

Just a meme within a meme.
"Orban, Fico, and Weidel have planned a great future for their countries."
Brought to you by #SaintFyodor, #Fidesz,
@AfD
#Физдец #MessageOfTheDay #MOTD #NAFOworks #AFDverbot

#SaintFyodor sez: "Frankfurt Airport: glorious monument to cheap fossil fules from Mother Russia, bad food at ridiculous prices, long waits for tiny toilets, an ordeal for the spirit. But lo and behold: Illumination!"
—Fyodor's Travel Guide

“Resistance to the ideology of the Russkiy mir is the matter for the future of the Church of Christ in the modern world,” the Head of the UGCC The religious and political ideology of the Russkiy mir is a product of the “fusion” of the altar and the throne — the Russian Orthodox Church and the Kremlin. The Moscow Patriarchate, which blesses R...

Oh bog, why hast thou forsaken thy servant, #SaintFyodor?

ugcc.ua/en/data/resi...

The Cannibal Cookbook: Your Guide to Preparing and Cooking Long Pig Forty delicious recipes to get the most out of your fresh carcass. International recipes with enough variety to please even the most refined and picky palates. Tried, true and tested methods of captur...

Consulting a recipe... 8 hours in the slow coals.

Having your drugies for dinner?
Find a recipe that is a winner
A real crowd pleaser
Even store in the freezer
A delicacy for both Saint and sinner.
-Fyodor's Guide to BBQ

www.amazon.com/Cannibal-Coo... #SaintFyodor

"For a three day war leadeth with a sound and a fury to a one day peace."
-Fyodor's Guide to Campaigning
#saintFyodor #victimOfThePutin

"Imagine airdropping leaflets over Moscow, telling people how their leader uses them as cannonfodder; sacrificing hospitals, schools, infrastructure that kept a cold country alive, and you'd be appealing to Western values. Facts only strengthen our faith."
- #SaintFyodor, #Cult Dynamics

Here's a meme of a tweet of a #victimOfThePutin.
A socalled "ordinary russian".

#SaintFyodor warns against stealing memes! Whatever you do, don't steal ! ;)

"The ground rose up to smite the fallen angels of the infidel. And lo, did the ground then blaze with all the righteousness of holy mother russia!"
-Fluid Histories of #SaintFyodor

For I am under the same accusation with my savior
For they said, He is besides himself.
-The Prophet, Christopher Smart.
Saith Saint Fyodor: "Madness that is holy. The Trump is saint material. Let us canonise Him at earliest opportunity. Get my agent on the phone!"
#SaintFyodor

In my opinion, a social experiment of low emotional intelligence. #smekalka

"There once was an angry Lumpkin
A hollowed-out brainless Pumpkin
But with time, pumpkins rot
Orange flesh turns to snot
By blind faith animated: a Trumpkin."
#SaintFyodor #poetry #warCoffee #poetrycommunity #NAFOworks

Having a great time, wish you were here.
#SaintFyodor #VictimOfThePutin

Lowly their attitude but high their aim
They creep to eminence through paths of shame
Till, fixed securely in the seats of pow'r
The dupes they flattered they at last devour.
-Ambrose Bierce
#SaintFyodor