well well well.
My first order on my 715 sites.
(template: schedule.demo.sotnichenko.net)
#quietbuild #sotnichenko #stillbuilding #burnoutcore #scheduleSotnichenko #minemosynelibrary #lifeasproject
Visited an exhibition today.
Everything spoke about the same thing:
transformation through tension.
The path hurts, but it reshapes you.
#Sotnichenko #quietbuild #path #transformation
Still alive. Still building.
#Sotnichenko #quietbuild
But right now, I can’t imagine myself without one.
It’s ritual. It’s armor.
It’s the thing I grab when everything else slips.
#sotnichenko #quietbuild #gritcore #energycrutch #hurtmebutholdme #lifeasitis #notstrongcoffee #copingshoulders #designingwhiletired
#drop0715 — №65
Q: What do you keep doing—even though you know it’s hurting you?
A: I drink energy drinks.
They don’t even give me energy.
It’s not a grown woman’s drink.
It’s not a coping strategy.
It’s not smart.
One second I blinked—
And there it was: a blade, buried in my finger.
I honestly don’t remember how.
But the scar never lets me forget.
#sotnichenko #quietbuild #scarstory #survivalsymbol #gritcore #lifebits #bodymemory
#drop0715 — №64
Q: Which part of your body became a symbol of survival?
A: The pinky on my left hand.
The only physical mark from a moment of unconscious self-harm.
A: There’s no magic. No secret formula.
I just keep going.
And when it feels like pure quicksand—
I still keep going.
There’s no reason. No excuse.
Not to.
#sotnichenko #quietbuild #gritcore #keepgoing #lifebits #notevenemptinessstopsme
#drop0715 — №63
Q: What do you do to keep going when you feel empty inside?
A: When things get really bad, I ground myself through stability.
And for me, there’s nothing more stable than eating the same dish for every meal.
I don’t think it’s exactly healthy—but it’s what keeps me standing.
#sotnichenko #quietbuild #repetitionasrefuge #burnoutcore #survivalpatterns
#drop0715 — №62
Q: What do you do when it’s unbearable—even though you know it’s hurting you?
A: A physical scream.
We’ve already talked about it with my therapist—
screaming is something I’m not ready for yet.
Because I know it won’t be just loud.
It’ll be destructive.
#sotnichenko #quietbuild #unscreamed #mentalhealthraw #stormwithin #lifebits
#drop0715 — №61
Q: What do you keep inside because you’re afraid—if you let it out, you won’t be able to stop?
A: I say I know how to be alone. But if I’m honest—I just haven’t met someone whose “I’m here” sounds like truth, not a threat.
I’m not looking for a savior.
I’m waiting for a match.
#sotnichenko #quietbuild #burnoutcore #notaboutloneliness #lifeasitis
#drop0715 — №60
Q: What truth about you is so uncomfortable—it’s easier to turn it into philosophy?
To be honest, it scares me how fast the weeks are flying by. Like. Super fast. Sometimes I feel like it's so fast that maybe I should postpone the launch to 2027.
Just thought of a joke while waiting for the tape:
The school director heard my degree was in computer graphics.
He caught the word designer —
and figured I must know how to paint walls.
I mean… I do.
But that’s not exactly what I studied in college.
If you’ve ever wondered what a school’s IT specialist does…
You’re welcome.
We paint walls now.
⠀
Just labor.
No code. Just coverage.
And still—somehow—debugging the system.
⠀
#sotnichenkoWIP #quietbuild #schoolsystem #nobugjustpaint #lifeasitis #handsdirtymindclear
How I refuse to play “nice” when I don’t feel it — even if that’s what’s expected.
⠀
Society likes soft women.
But I’m sharp.
And real.
#sotnichenko #quietbuild #gritcore #notyournicegirl #rawtruth #shebuilds #lifeasitis
#drop0715 — №59
Q: What do you love about yourself—even though society disapproves?
A: My coldness.
The way I can shut down and move forward without asking for permission.
How I choose to be ruthless with myself — but honest.
It’s not a crisis. It’s not a cry for help.
It’s just… there.
Like background music I never chose, but can't turn off.
#sotnichenko #quietbuild #mentalhealthraw #lifebits #hauntednotgone #aliveanyway #truthdrop
#drop0715 — №58
Q: What desire haunts you like an obsession?
A: The desire to die.
It follows me—no matter what state I’m in.
Even on medication.
Even when things are okay.
He got the credit.
I got the sleepless nights.
That was the last time I let anyone stand in my light.
#sotnichenko #quietbuild #takingpower #ownyourwork #leadershiptruth #womendoitall #invisiblelabor
#drop0715 — №57
Q: When did you realize: no one’s going to give me power—I’m taking it?
A: I was around 20.
I ran an entire summer camp like a director—handled everything from logistics to crisis calls.
But the official “director” was a man.
I wasn’t a person there. I was a function.
Someone who was tolerated, not embraced.
Truth is… I still don’t know how to just be.
#sotnichenko #quietbuild #notwelcome #homesickness #invisiblechild #functionnotfeeling
#drop0715 — №56
Q: Where did you want to stay—but realized you weren’t welcome?
A: I just wanted a home.
But even in my father's house, even when I moved in with my mother later—
it never felt like home.
How I walk my path without losing focus in the noise—
not literal noise, but the kind that pulls you off course.
Most days, I don’t even hear the music.
It’s like a radio receiver helping me find the right frequency inside myself.
#sotnichenko #quietbuild #tunein #headphonelife #innerworld #thisisme
#drop0715 — №55
Q: Which of your habits isn’t a whim—but a manifesto of who you are?
A: Wearing headphones. Almost always.
It’s not about hiding from the world.
It’s how I tune in to my own signal.
