Protesters showed up in Rome, Italy for a No Kings/No Tyrants protest!

Love it!

Today’s Papers Rewired #197: The Morning Brief They Don’t Want You to Read Sunday, Stirrups, Screens, Sussex Side Quests, Smooth Cornish Roads, and the Internationalisation of Absolute Bollocks

Good morning Leg’ends.

It is Sunday, the day of our Lord, and from the look of things the gods have buggered off for a lie-in, left the halo on a chair.
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satiricalplanet.substack.com/p/todays-pap...
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#MediaCritique #ukPolitics #War #Propaganda #UKNews #Satire #PublicDiscourse

Satirical Planet News: Weather Sunday 29 March 2026 Britain Opens The Curtains, Sees Cloud, Rain, Wind, Then Pretends This Counts As Stability

Good morning, Leg’ends,

Britain has woken up to one of its favourite national arrangements, a cold star.
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#UKWeather #BritishWeather #SundayVibes #WeatherReport #UKLife #RainyDays #Windy

Elon Musk: Europe Has Not Banned Grok. It Has Started Treating It Like a Dangerous Machine With a PR Team. Not a ban, but a Dutch ruling, EU pressure, and multiple investigations are exposing what happens when a platform’s safety claims fail in the real world.

Well Leg’ends,

Europe has not banned Grok across the entire EU. That is the first thing to get straight. What happened this week is narrower than that, but in some ways more serious.
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#AIRegulation #DigitalRights #Deepfakes #EUlaw #BigTech

Dear Samuel Ramani: The Poor Are Not Your Alibi for Trump and Netanyahu How a real supply shock gets turned into moral blackmail, and why opposing a war of choice is not “enabling starvation”

Dear Samuel,

I read your piece with the same feeling one gets when somebody wheels a lectern into a fire. You pause because the subject is serious. Hunger is serious. Shipping disruption is serious.
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#Satire #AntiWar #MediaSpin #BlameGame #ukPolitics

My Mum used to say.. “where there’s no sense, there’s no feeling”….. I get it now Mum.

Your mum was 100% right. Thanks for the post!

Today’s Papers Rewired #196: The Morning Brief They Don’t Want You to Read A new format, same chaos, war, money, media spin, and a country being quietly arranged before breakfast.

Good afternoon, Leg’ends.

Well, it is another day in paradise, and the news is, as ever, an absolute clusterfuck. A bit late today....
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satiricalplanet.substack.com/p/todays-pap...
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#MorningPapers #UKPolitics #WorldNews #Iran #Geopolitics #Trump #Starmer #Netanyahu #CultureWars #MediaBias

Cheers for that, Celina, we aim to be the literary equivalent of a badly wired kettle, loud, slightly dangerous, and impossible to ignore.

Glad it’s making you splutter, that’s half the point. The other half is keeping the madness honest.

Dear Tim Stanley: The Great British Forecourt Illusion How political theatre replaced policy, and why shouting at a pump is not a plan

Dear Tim,

I read your column with the same curiosity one feels when standing on a petrol forecourt at dusk, watching a man in a high-vis jacket explain the nation.
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#Politics #Satire #UKPolitics

Today’s Papers Rewired #195: The Morning Brief They Don’t Want You to Read A new format, same chaos, war, money, media spin, and a country being quietly arranged before breakfast.

A new format, same chaos, war, money, media spin, and a country being quietly arranged before breakfast.
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satiricalplanet.substack.com/p/todays-pap...
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#TodaysPapers #Media #GulfCrisis #UKPolitics

SPN: Suddenly, Dirty Money Is a Threat to Democracy Westminster can live with a grubby political funding system for years. What it cannot live with is Nigel Farage learning how to use it.

Well Leg’ends,

On Wednesday 25 March 2026, the government moved to cap overseas donations and shut down crypto funding in politics.
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satiricalplanet.substack.com/p/spn-sudden...
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#UKPolitics #DirtyMoney #ReformUK #Farage #Westminster #PoliticalSatire #FollowTheMoney #DemocracyUK

Beating the populist right: lessons from France’s municipal elections France’s recent municipal elections did not deliver a decisive defeat for the far right, but they did reveal something more valuable: how the left can win when it is disciplined, grounded and able to ...

Beating the populist right: lessons from France’s municipal elections

northeastbylines.co.uk/news/politic...

Today’s Papers Rewired #194: The Morning Brief They Don’t Want You to Read A new format, same chaos, war, money, media spin, and a country being quietly arranged before breakfast.

The biggest story, the one that actually matters however hard the papers try to bury it beneath sleaze, shouting and culture-war mulch, is the war story.
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satiricalplanet.substack.com/p/todays-pap...
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#TodaysPapers #Media #GulfCrisis #UKPolitics

SPN: A Party Patirical Substack On Behalf Of The Green Party Rip-Off Britain, Now With Added Service Charges

We live in rip-off Britain. Not “challenging times” Britain, which is what a minister says when he wants to describe a mugging as a learning opportunity. Based on Zack Polanski speech on the economy
@zackpolanski.bsky.social
satiricalplanet.substack.com/p/spn-a-part...
#VoteGreen #GetGreensElected

Today’s Papers #193: A Hug Stops a Bomber, Reeves Plays Energy Roulette, And Britain Gets Bribed With £5 Off at Dobbies A hospital patient stops mass murder with basic decency, Whitehall fumbles the paperwork again, and the front pages offer garden-centre discounts like they’re part of national resilience.

Good morning to the lovely people of Britain, and the even luckier people abroad, who get to watch this country from a safe distance like you watch a man carrying a wardrobe up a narrow staircase.
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satiricalplanet.substack.com/p/todays-pap...
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#TodaysPapers #Media #GulfCrisis #UKPolitics

Satirical Planet News: Weather Wednesday 25 March 2026 Britain Opens The Curtains, Sees Arctic Nonsense, Pretends This Is Fine

Good Morning Leg’ends,

You poor overdressed optimists, out there negotiating with a sky that has never once negotiated in good faith.
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satiricalplanet.substack.com/p/satirical-...
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#UKWeather #BritishWeather #SpringInBritain #UK

Today’s Papers#192: Trump’s Five-Day Tantrum, Burning Ambulances, And Britain’s Discount Voucher Coping Doctrine Trump pauses the bombing mid-bellow, London wakes to antisemitic arson, and the papers offer vouchers and fluff as sandbags.

Good morning to everyone in Britain, and to anyone watching from abroad, where this country must now look like a very expensive escape room run by committee.
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satiricalplanet.substack.com/p/todays-pap...
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#UKPolitics #Trump #IranCrisis #CostOfLiving #MediaSatire #FrontPages #Geopolitics #satire

Satirical Planet News: Weather Tuesday 24 March 2026 Britain Announces Mild Stability, Then Nicks Its Own Promise By Mid-Afternoon

Good Morning Leg’ends,

Britain has opened the day the way it always does when the temperature scrapes past miserable, by mistaking a temporary lack of catastrophe for a change in national fortune.
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satiricalplanet.substack.com/p/satirical-...
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#UKWeather #BritishWeather #SpringInBritain #UK

from Fraser Nelson:

Today’s Papers #191: Axe gangs, cremated monsters, Beckham’s begonias, and Britain trying to read a Gulf crisis through compost coupons, tabloid bile and commuter-grade panic If the Strait of Hormuz is starting to cough up the world economy, perhaps stop taping garden-centre offers to the nation’s forehead like a wet apology

Monday has crawled in smelling of hot wires, stale panic and bargain compost, one half strategic crisis, one half absolute drivel, both kicked into the same national carrier bag and left sweating on the lino.
satiricalplanet.substack.com/p/todays-pap...
#TodaysPapers #Media #GulfCrisis #UKPolitics

Satirical Planet News: Weather Monday 23 March 2026 Britain Tries Regional Optimism Again, Atlantic Arrives With Paperwork

Good Morning Leg’ends,

You Geographically Uneven Hope Merchants. Britain has split into two emotional jurisdictions.
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satiricalplanet.substack.com/p/satirical-...
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#UKWeather #BritishWeather #NorthSouthDivide #SunnySpell #AtlanticWeather #RainIncoming #WeatherSatire #SPN

REFORM UK: Nigel Farage Wants to Govern, Fine, Show Us the Numbers. Reform wants the keys to the country. The sums still do not unlock the door.

Well Leg’ends,

For years Nigel Farage had the easiest job in British politics. Stand outside the building. Lob bricks at the windows. Call it leadership.
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satiricalplanet.substack.com/p/reform-uk-...
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#UKPolitics #ReformUK #NigelFarage #PoliticalSatire #SatiricalPlanetNews #Editorial

Robert Mueller: The Upright Prosecutor Who Spent A Lifetime Serving The State, Then Got Dragged Into Trump’s Inflatable Sewer What happens when a prosecutor who believes in the law is forced to audit a presidency that treats it like a doormat

Mueller had spent decades building the sort of career that now feels almost impossible to imagine, because it required discipline and delayed gratification.
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satiricalplanet.substack.com/p/robert-mue...
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#Trump #Mueller #TrumpRussia #Corruption #Scandal #Politics

Today’s Papers #190: Corgi cloning, missile panic, nightclub pensioners, and Britain’s Sunday press trying to smother a strategic crisis under royal fluff, celebrity spit and a free bottle of lotion If the world’s getting dangerous, stop selling it next to cloned dogs and a loyalty-card discount

Good morning to Britain,

Sunday has arrived in the usual national style, half state alert, half church-hall jumble sale after somebody’s driven a forklift through the wall
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satiricalplanet.substack.com/p/todays-pap...
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#Satire #UKnews #Media #Iran #Energy #Royals #FrontPages #ukpolitics

Satirical Planet News: Weather Sunday 22 March 2026 Britain Enjoys Brief Emotional Recovery, Immediately Mugged by Reality in a Cloud Coat

Good Morning Leg’ends,
You Slightly Chastened Sun Addicts. Britain has now entered the hangover phase of optimism.
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satiricalplanet.substack.com/p/satirical-...
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#UKWeather #BritishWeather #SpringFail #SunHangover #CloudsReturn #RainAgain #ColdSnap #WeatherMood #UKForecast #BritishHumour

Today’s Papers #189: Energy shock, rate-rise dread, and Britain’s front pages still finding room for dog detectives, coastal monarchy and Tina Turner as rentable ectoplasm Too long for your inbox, too real for your comfort.

Good morning to Britain,
This piece is satire based on real-world events. If it feels absurd, that’s because reality got there first.
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satiricalplanet.substack.com/p/todays-pap...
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#UKPolitics #CostOfLiving #EnergyCrisis #Inflation #MiddleEast #GasPrices #MediaSatire #TodaysPapers

Satirical Planet News: Weather Friday 20 March 2026 Britain Reaches Day Three of Sunlight, Immediately Starts Acting Like the Country Has Been Personally Forgiven

Good Morning Leg’ends,
You Heat-Drunk Little Visionaries. Britain has now reached Day Three of decent weather, which means the country is no longer enjoying spring in a normal human way.
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satiricalplanet.substack.com/p/satirical-...
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#UKWeather #BritishHumour #SunnyChaos #SpringMadness

All the signs that Labour wants to undo Brexit The Government says it will not rejoin the customs union or single market, but senior figures have been pushing for clos

Chancellor Rachel Reeves argued that where it was in the national interest, the UK should be “prepared to align with EU regulation, including in further areas of the single market”.

Reeves is right. Deeper alignment is the quickest way to deliver economic growth and unlock Britain's potential...

What we witnessed in London at the historic Trafalgar Square, in a country built on Judeo-Christian values, was a group of people attempting dominance over our capital city and our culture We are not going to surrender everything that was built over centuries and defended at great cost in two world wars for us to be a free. independent nation The British people will not put up with this any longer - simple a

Who's "we" and which "people" does he speak of?

I'm delighted to live in a city where people can choose to believe what they like and demonstrate it when they please just so long as they aren't intimidating anyone... which is apparently all Mr Farage can ever muster