Sorry, Earth.

Unfortunately, I could resist.

I know a lot of your people were counting on me.

#AwkwardMissedConnectionAd

They never told you that that one step was a doozy, but I guess that's how your ex had it built

#AwkwardMissedConnectionAd

That was the wrong hole, you idiot!

Don't all men realize that women are multiple choice tests?

Sure, men have passageways combined, and that's a vas deferens AND a vast difference!

#AwkwardMissedConnectionAd

I thought we agreed that we were going to see the Melania movie together...

Just kidding.

I hope you didn't actually go!

That shit must be awful!

I doubt anyone's going to waste their money on that dumpster fire!

#AwkwardMissedConnectionAd

a man on a bike is being chased by police officers ALT: a man on a bike is being chased by police officers

#AwkwardMissedConnectionAd

Saw you as I pepper sprayed your peaceful protest against the #Gutstapo our eyes met, admittedly yours were streaming

Hit me up

YOU: Kinda Sloppy Girl eating spaghetti alone at Olive Garden

ME: Guy Far-Too-Invested in Lady And The Tramp
(sorry bout that)

Wanna get together and Share A Footlong?
🙂

#AwkwardMissedConnectionAd

All those little things we used to do together were special in their own way, but I miss that we didn't get to hang together that one last time

#AwkwardMissedConnectionAd

Smiling barn owl with an arrow pointing at it, with text "ABOUT TO DO A HEINOUS".

You were the one hoo ran away after being swooped by an owl. I was that owl. I only want to be frens, I swear.🦉✨

#AwkwardMissedConnectionAd

#WednesdayChocolateWars #HashtagGame

I know your friends didn't miss me, but that day in Butler, I really wanted your heart, not your ear.

#AwkwardMissedConnectionAd

#AwkwardMissedConnectionAd is this week's #WednesdayChocolateWars #HashtagGame !

Follow your hosts and PLAY NOW with @Indistarr.bsky.social @Vasego1.bsky.social @SwissMistress.bsky.social and @WedChocWars.bsky.social !

(Clothing optional)