I have eaten
the blackberries
that were in
the fridge
and which
you were probably
saving
for a cobbler
What ever
they were delicious
so sweet
and so cold
And I didn’t have to buy them.
#DamnKids #Dadlyfe
Perfect!
Who's gonna watch my kids? 😅
#babysitter #helpwanted #damnkids #gamingmom
Time for another round of I Don't Always Inexpertly Flog My Sport Bike Around In Aimless Loops... But When I Do The Whole Town Has To Listen To It. (Not me, the neighbor's kid. I learned how to rev match decades ago.🙄)
#OldManYellsAtCloud #GetOffMyLawn #DamnKids
Oh goodie! It's leaf blower season again. Nothing makes me quite as homicidal as the drone of a gas powered leaf blower 🤬
#noise #leafblower #damnkids #getoffmylawn
It’s my son’s bday, so he’s the DJ today. Currently streaming “Cat flushing toilet radio”
….4/5 🌟
#dadlife #happybday #damnkids.
Dropped the kid off at a sleepover. If you are an adult in these kids’ lives & have had a colonoscopy, I know who you are now. Cause… kids. #damnkids #kids #snitchesdontgetstitchesiguess
Took my boys to lunch. They both ordered wings & fries. I ordered a cobb salad.
“Damn that’s a great salad!”
“Dad please be quiet. We don’t want anyone to hear you be lame.”
#ParenthoodRules #DamnKids
Ah I see! #damnkids
Where is your father?! Damn!
#blackmomlife #holdonkids #momlifebelike #momlife #ijustarrived #givemeaminute #whereisyourfather #damnkids #toytalks2you #toytalkstoyou
I genuinely hate how much I love having smart light bulbs I can control through my Alexa.
I can tell I'm getting older by how I hate NewThingTM... Except when they let me stay cozy in bed.
#getofflawn #damnkids #irememberaoldialup
IDC if you homeschool or send your kids to public school.... All of them KNOW it's a holiday and all of them are acting a fucking fool... It's not just you and you're doing fine #sahm #homeschool #damnkids
Jake’s wondering why I’m playing my music through the speakers now.
It’s a mystery dude.
#DamnKids
Because of my heart, I take meds to reduce my adrenaline response.
Put earbuds in…
Jake snuck up behind me…
Scared the bejesus outta me…
Laughed so hard/long that it counts as a workout.
Holy shit, even with the meds I’m feeling the spike/crash. It’s officially Nap O’Clock here.
#DamnKids
My 4 year old nephew favorite phrase is what chu talking bout? And depending on his mood he says it in different ways and its soo funny especially when he sings it lol #damnkids #4yearolds #auntieduties
Daily Dose of Anti-Corona Humor
#AnticoronaHumor
#YearsOfTheVariants
#AtLeastItWasNotAFiddle
#DamnKids
Apparently I'm old enough that I need to start messing with fonts again. #damnkids #getoffmylawn
daughter just got picked up from camp. first words to her dad "I can't wait for tomorrow!" #damnkids
I don't have $350 a month to spend on my appearance. #damnkids
@CMaeTay @cmhutch It's ok. Except for the spine, they're all cartilage till they hit 4 or 5. Like sharks. #damnkids
My performance as replacement @JoeSpence yesterday at @Meme725's graduation party was definitely one of my best. #DamnKids
