A staged photo of two costumed mascots shaking hands in a bleak corporate lobby. On the left is a suited humanoid with a printed “PWC” badge and a glowing clipboard, evoking corporate authority. On the right is the Kool-Aid Man — a giant grinning glass pitcher of red liquid. Cracked drywall behind them suggests he just smashed through the building. Office chairs are knocked over. A banner reads “Quarterly Transparency Summit.” The energy is chaotic and wildly inappropriate — a parody of misguided brand synergy.

MIT officiates unholy union between Raytheon and Boston Dynamics.
Vows were optimized.
Reception powered by haunted DARPA grants.
Patents rusted. Morality deprecated.

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