Six So-So Retirement Spots for Boneheads who Never Saved a Penny — Little Old Lady You knew old age was coming but you didn’t think it would arrive so fast, and now it’s breathing down your neck like a halitosis-ridden hellhound. Did you start a rainy-day fund? Divert part of your p...

I'm proud to announce that Little Old Lady Comedy published my humor piece "Six So-So Retirement Spots for Boneheads who Never Saved a Penny." Take a look and then check out the other articles there as well!

www.littleoldladycomedy.com/all-works/u7...

#humor #funny #funnywriting #LOL

CONTUNDE IPSUM! | Eric Kilkenny Get more from Eric Kilkenny on Patreon

CONTUNDE IPUSUM!

My family crest is a potato masher.

I'm serious. If we had a banner to carry into battle, it would just be this [mimes holding up a potato masher] wavy metal thing on a stick. Our motto would be "Just Mash It Yourself, For God's Sake."

#writer #funnywriting #humorist

Fonts: The Office Personalities We Pretend To Have Reinvention is just a drop-down menu away

Thinking of fonts as costumes for office personalities!

New essay: “Fonts: The Office Personalities We Pretend to Have”

medium.com/@leni.quinn/...

#writingksy #humor #essaywriting #writersofmedium #funnywriting #observationalhumor

हिन्दी कैलिग्राफी सीखने बैठा था ✍️, पेन इतना घूम गया जैसे मैं maths का integral निकाल रहा हूँ 🤯😂 #HindiCalligraphy #FunnyWriting #CreativeTwist #DesiHumor

THE ROSTA REPORT A weekly roundup of weird news, personal chaos, and unsolicited opinions

The Rosta Report — Weekly Absurdity + Truth
Hook:
News. Snacks. Emotional truths.
It’s like The Daily Show met a travel blog and had a midlife crisis.

🔗 medium.com/activated-th...
#newsletter #humor #culture #newsrecap #funnywriting

Rankings That No One Asked For Day 3: Global Public Bathroom Experiences, Ranked by Emotional Damage

Rankings That No One Asked For
Hook:
I ranked things no one needed ranked:
Chairs. Doorbells. Potato chips. Public bathrooms.
And I stand by all of it.

🔗 medium.com/activated-th...
#humor #funnywriting #lists #satire #viralpost

I’m Aging Like a Fine Box of Receipts Crumpled. Mysterious. And possibly expired.

I’m Aging Like a Fine Box of Receipts
Hook:
Crumpled. Mysterious. Possibly expired.
This is my midlife.
Not glamorous — just real.

🔗 medium.com/@bwrosta73/i...
#midlife #aging #funnywriting #nostalgia #lifelessons

I Joined a Cult by Accident. It Was … Fine? A true story of incense, iced coffee, and questionable chanting

I Joined a Cult by Accident. It Was Fine.
Hook:
I thought I was signing up for a free iced coffee.
Turns out I accidentally joined a cult.
It was … fine?

🔗 medium.com/activated-th...
#humor #satire #weirdstories #cultlife #funnywriting

My Brain Is Now a Museum of Commercial Jingles They moved in rent-free — and brought all their weird cousins.

My brain is a jingle museum.
Admission is free. The earworms are forever.
🎶
medium.com/@bwrosta73/m...
#GenXMemories #CommercialJingles #NostalgiaHit #FunnyWriting #PopCultureArchive

The Couch Is the Real Star of Every Sitcom And yes, I’m emotionally attached to it

The couch is the real star of every sitcom.
And yes, I’m emotionally attached to it.
👉 medium.com/funny-inc/th...
#TV #sitcoms #humor #funnywriting #popculture

I Didn’t Lose My Temper. I Donated It Anger in midlife doesn’t erupt — it evaporates

I didn’t lose my temper. I donated it.
It’s gone now.
👉 medium.com/@bwrosta73/i...
#anger #funnywriting #midlife #relatable #humor

My Brain Has Too Many Open Tabs No one warned me about midlife memory

My brain has too many open tabs.
And none of them are labeled.
👉 medium.com/@bwrosta73/m...
#mentalhealth #anxiety #funnywriting #overthinking #relatable

Why Are Airports Still Selling Neck Pillows? A $29 inflatable lie and the science of regret

Why are airports still selling neck pillows?
Because someone hates us and wants us to suffer publicly.
👉 medium.com/the-springbo...
#airports #travelhumor #satire #funnywriting #middleage

I Keep Trash Because of Feelings Apparently, grief fits in a Ziploc bag next to an expired ChapStick.

It’s not just a movie ticket from 2003.
It’s a psychological landfill I call “my drawer.”

👉 medium.com/the-springbo...

#SentimentalHoarding #MemoryClutter #FunnyWriting #EmotionalBaggage #TheSpringboard

My Metabolism Is in a Witness Protection Program It changed its name and left me for dead.

My metabolism didn’t slow down. It disappeared. It’s in hiding.
medium.com/@bwrosta73/m...
#WeightLossHumor #MidlifeBody #MetabolismMystery #ZepboundLife #FunnyWriting

Tried to buy a hooker for a friend.
Wrote about it.
It’s dumb, honest, and a little sad.
Link in bio.

#confession #storytime #essayist #sexwork #malementalhealth #virginity #morality #funnywriting

Is a hot dog a sandwich?
This question has ruined friendships.
Let these two lunatics argue it for you.
👇
medium.com/@bwrosta73/p...
#FoodDebate #HotDogVsSandwich #FunnyWriting #SatiricalHumor #PointCounterpoint

How Many Thoughts Is Too Many for One Shower? A breakdown of what I can over-analyze before rinsing out my conditioner

I had 47 thoughts during one shower.
And that was before conditioner. Here’s how my brain works now.
medium.com/thought-thin...
#FunnyWriting #Midlife #Travel #Relatable #Humor

Japan Has a Festival for Everything. Even That. Sea bream. Lanterns. Unexpected tears.

Japan has a festival for everything.
I clapped for sea bream and cried in a sumo shrine.
medium.com/@bwrosta73/j...
#FunnyWriting #Midlife #Travel #Relatable #Humor

Why Does Every American Town Now Look Like a Glorified Storage Unit? If I see one more mattress superstore, I will scream into an Arby’s.

Every American town now looks like a mattress outlet with a Dunkin’.
And I’m mad about it — hilariously.
medium.com/another-fuck...
#FunnyWriting #Midlife #Travel #Relatable #Humor

What Eating Alone at a Denny’s at 11 PM Taught Me About My Life Falling Apart A hash brown. A breakdown. A strangely comforting booth.

A Denny’s booth. An 11 PM breakdown. A spiritual revelation involving hash browns.
You’ve been warned.
medium.com/@bwrosta73/w...
#FunnyWriting #Midlife #Travel #Relatable #Humor

I Risked My Life for Fried Butter — And I’d Do It Again A love letter to dangerous food, deep fryers, and poor decisions on a stick.

I ate fried butter and lived to tell the tale.
This is either brave or stupid — you decide.
medium.com/@bwrosta73/i...
#FunnyWriting #Midlife #Travel #Relatable #Humor

The Benefits of Being Barely Supervised As the youngest of four, I got away with everything — and turned out fine-ish.

Being the youngest of four meant no supervision, no structure, and no regrets.
Mostly.
medium.com/@bwrosta73/t...
#FunnyWriting #Midlife #Travel #Relatable #Humor

Everything Feels Like a Second Job — Even Rest We can’t stop optimizing. Even our downtime feels productive.

Even rest feels like a job now.
And I’m apparently the unpaid intern of my own self-care.
medium.com/the-honest-p...
#FunnyWriting #Midlife #Travel #Relatable #Humor

7 Japanese Words That Perfectly Describe My Midlife Crisis And at least three of them quietly insult me.

Japanese has a word for crying at cherry blossoms and buying books you’ll never read.
So basically, my entire life.
medium.com/@bwrosta73/7...
#FunnyWriting #Midlife #Travel #Relatable #Humor

Why Estonia Feels Like the Future — But With Better Sauna Culture No one talks. Everything works. And I might never recover.

Estonia has better Wi-Fi than your house and hotter saunas than your gym.
I saw the future — and it was sweating.
medium.com/@bwrosta73/w...
#FunnyWriting #Midlife #Travel #Relatable #Humor

You Can’t Just Wander Into Georgia (the Country) Without Being Force-Fed Wine and Friendship Also, you will almost die in a marshrutka. But in a charming, scenic way.

medium.com/@bwrosta73/y...
#Midlife #FunnyWriting #Relatable #LifeStuff

The Panic Calculator I tried to plan the rest of my life in Excel. It got weird.

medium.com/crows-feet/t...
#Midlife #FunnyWriting #Relatable #LifeStuff

I Was the Youngest Person at Work. Then I Wasn’t. And no one tells you when it happens.

New post. Funny. Personal. Probably unhinged in a relatable way.
medium.com/crows-feet/i...
#Midlife #FunnyWriting #Relatable #LifeStuff

I Speak Fluent 80s — And No One Under 35 Knows What I’m Saying They speak meme. I speak Mork & Mindy.

I speak fluent 80s.
They speak meme.
And when I say “Where’s the beef?” in a meeting, they think I’m having a stroke.
This is a love letter to generational confusion:
medium.com/@bwrosta73/i...
#Midlife #80sKids #GenX #Nostalgia #FunnyWriting