"All I want from a man is that he can drink like a fish, fuck like a mountain gorilla, and leave before I wake up."
#GameNightQuotes
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Me: *reads off default skills to bypass an obstacle*
Player 1: "I'm a Charisma character! I don't have any of those!"
Player 2: "Can you roll to seduce the ice wall?"
#GameNightQuotes
#Pathfinder
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Player: "So, the wolf skeleton's skull doesn't return immediately?"
Me: "No, not till its next turn"
P: "So does that mean I can attack it?"
M: "That sounds entertaining--I'll allow it"
P: "Alright! I use Flurry of Blows to punt the skull!"
#GameNightQuotes
#Pathfinder
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"For some people anxiety means that they don't leave the house. For Amy... it means that she's literally picking a fight with 85% of the observable universe."
#GameNightQuotes
#MutantsAndMasterminds
#TTRPG
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#GameNightQuotes: "Do we know anything about these sailor's burial rites?"
"That's a Knowledge Local check."
"My skill check of a 4 tells me these sailors want their bodies catapulted comically into the jungle."
"Well I got a 15, what so I know?"
"That local sailors prefer you to use trebuchets."
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"If we don't separate these two soon we're gonna have to update the topographical maps of Ontario."
#GameNightQuotes
#MutantsAndMasterminds
#TTRPG
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"Noah is dead, man, and you can't handle it. It's left a hole that you're trying to fill by --"
"Filling holes?"
"Yes, fuck you for cheapening the moment."
#GameNightQuotes
#MutantsAndMasterminds
#TTRPG
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#GameNightQuotes: "I think he's an Ettin neck-amputee."
"So, a hill giant?"
"Awwwwww. I can see it now. 'Bert got beheaded last night.' 'Oh goodness, how is he!?' 'Oh, he's fine. A little lonely.' "
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“It’s a fun dungeon crawl—a FUNgeon, if you will.”
#GameNightQuotes
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"You're fuckin' the weed man for weed?"
"No, I don't smoke."
"Oh."
"I fuck him because he's got a hurricane tongue and a big-ass d--"
"Hey, look at that shiny change of subject!"
#GameNightQuotes
#MutantsAndMasterminds
#TTRPG
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#GameNightQuotes #SF2E "I already put an ad on the infosphere for a quick and discrete meetup with a living elebrian!"
"...Can I smite the skittermander?"
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#GameNightQuotes #SF2E "No little skeleton boy! Don't go in the bone cave!"
"Oh mein gött! This cave ist full of corpsënfleeten!"
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PCs found a pre-Gap book from the time of Golarion in #Starfinder. As usual, the text was obscured by the effects of the Gap so I rendered the title "Die Ausbleichung" (The Bleaching, in German) as "D#e A#sble#ch#ung". Unfortunately one player read this as "Die Assbleaching" 😂
#GameNightQuotes
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#GameNightQuotes: "You hear haunting, lilting voicing singing a song."
"A FAIRY song?"
"It is almost certainly a fairy song."
"Oi fey."
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#GameNightQuotes: "Druid, it's your turn."
"I have a plan."
"Okay."
"It's a really good plan."
"Okay. What is the plan?"
"I yell 'HEY ASSHOLE, WE'RE OVER HERE!' and then I run away."
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#GameNightQuotes: "Since I am trying to distract the fire elemental I guess I'll try to look... hot?"
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#GameNightQuotes: (Circa 2022) "I pass a beartrap up to her so she can clamp it onto a tree and trail the chain down for us to climb up."
"Heh. You and your bear-traps."
"Hey, when the only tool on your sheet is a bear trap..."
"Everything looks like a bear? But, in this case, it's a good idea."
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"Is 'Eichmann' a verb now?"
#GameNightQuotes
#MutantsAndMasterminds
#TTRPG
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#GameNightQuotes: "Don't worry, we can save you. By which I mean the cleric can raise you after 5 days."
"Five days?! I can raise him the next round!"
"The next round?! It took you five days to raise me, after I died!"
"Well, you were extra-dead. You'd stayed dead beyond your 'best raised by' date."
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#GameNightQuotes: "I am bothered by the ongoing stupidity..."
"You'll HAVE to be more specific."
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"I'm not gonna cheat ya when a dragon's about to eat ya!"
#GameNightQuotes #PF2e #IsleOfDread
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"I'm not gonna take moral judgement from someone who's been declared a domestic terrorist by three separate administrations."
"Sound like exactly the kind of person you *should* listen to."
#GameNightQuotes
#MutantsAndMasterminds
#TTRPG
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"He's saved the Earth six times."
"And the Moon twice!"
#GameNightQuotes
#MutantsAndMasterminds
#TTRPG
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#GameNightQuotes: "It may not be paying off in this case, but militarily, their plans are good tactics."
"Yeah, but you know that whole 'plans don't survive contact with the enemy?' We *are* that enemy."
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#GameNightQuotes: (Circa 2019) "And she called me little sister. Because apparently all cats know each other."
"Sure, they take pride in that."
(groans)
"Sorry, do you wish you hadn't herd that?"
(groans)
"Should I pack it in?"
(groans)
"Are you all going to murder me?"
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"There's nothing like snorting an ayahuasca frog to make you a better captain."
#gamenightquotes
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#Gamenightquotes: (Circa 2014) "Okay, time to play Pathfinder! Would you care to read the minutes of the last game?"
"Attack. Kill. Win. Loot."
"Good enough."
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#GameNightQuotes
GM: Your poppet is looking up at the giant...they aren't wearing anything under the cloth.
Me: After your demise I will fashion a hat from your foreskin.
Party Wizard: I will burn you and your hat. Don't do it.
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#GameNightQuotes: "THAT is like trying to find the exact distance from a nuclear blast at which your frozen pizza is perfectly cooked!"
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"Try to run, try to fight, it won't matter, you can't save them all."
"Mister, this is *my* house*. The only person who is going to need saving is you."
#GameNightQuotes
#MutantsAndMasterminds
#TTRPG
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