a woman in a purple shirt is saying `` i crack myself up '' while sitting in front of a television . ALT: a woman in a purple shirt is saying `` i crack myself up '' while sitting in front of a television .

Confucius says: He who put penis in peanut butter is f*cking nuts!!!

#ConfuciusSays #NaughtyPuns 😆🔥😆

Confucius says: if foreplay is a microwave, don’t expect a Michelin star.

#ConfuciusSays #NaughtyPuns 😆🔥

Confucius says: treat the sheets like terra firma — respect them or you’ll sleep on the couch.

#ConuciusSays #NaughtyPuns 😆🔥

Confucius says: one-move performers get standing ovations only from their own mirror.

#ConfuciusSays #NaughtyPuns 🔥

Confucius says: bragging about technique is like advertising a restaurant with an empty dining room.

#ConfuciusSays #NaughtyPuns 🔥😉

Confucius says: silence in bed can be intimacy… or a technical fault. Check the wiring.

#ConfuciusSays #NaughtyPuns 🔥

Confucius says: consent is sexy; consent with coffee afterward is legendary.

#ConfuciusSays #NaughtyPuns #Coffee 😆🔥

Confucius says: if your pick-up line needs a PowerPoint, you’re already doomed.

#ConfuciusSays #NaughtyPuns 😉🔥

Confucius says: good foreplay is like a good opener — skip it and you lose the crowd.

#ConfuciusSays #NaughtyPuns 🔥