Just so we’re all on the same page here:
#ThatAsshole is now #completelybonkers, correct?
As in, #psychoticAF.

#Alcatraz?
#PopeDreams?
#MovieTarriffs?

More clues that #Miller is actually President.
Also known as: #PresidentGoebbels.

We are being duped now.

Found on Rednote. China can’t stop talking about our predicament.
Feels like reality and wild delusion have collided.
#popedreams

Throne to be enlarged to ensure that during any time spent ex cathedra I will be infallible thanks to physics as well as God.

#PopeDreams

We will convert all to the One True Faith, [To be disclosed later.]

#PopeDreams

I promise that if Frankie comes back in three days I’ll give him the job back.

#PopeDreams

Prayerobics to replace standard liturgies in the largest churches so we can get those butts in pews moving!

#PopeDreams

We will abolish the burning of heretics as the carbon released contributes to global warming.

We will compost them instead.

#PopeDreams

Yeah, I know the sacramental wine is good, but I’ve got a guy that can give us ac really good deal and definitely not give me a kickback.

#PopeDreams

We’re going to purge the Church of the worst clerics by starting up pedophile crucifictions.

Granted it’ll take a while since I’ve only got the one nail gun…

#PopeDreams

I will legalize same sex priest marriages just to anger the traditionalists.

#PopeDreams

The new translation of the Bible will make it clear that it was, indeed, Adam and Steve.

Why we didn’t know Adam was a Minecraft fan until now is a sacred mystery.

#PopeDreams

If you’re also in the running too become the next pope, tag your campaign promises #PopeDreams.

Like, when I’m pope, new liturgy will drop where sacramental wine is replaced with the blessed weed!