A CD cover, Esteesee by Ange Hardy, photographed on a white floor
Christening my new CD player. There was only one choice for the first play, in fond memory of @wombat37.bsky.social . This was an album we both enthused over.
Farewell, Mr W.
#FuckCancer #WomsLastStand
Fuck, and I mean this most very sincerely, Cancer.
Goodbye, my beautiful friend.
#FuckCancer
#WomsLastStand
It’s all just shitty. You deserve so much peace at this time. Hope you had a better Doctor dealing with you (or an even better nurse). #WomsLastStand
Just had emergency middle-of-the-night catheter change due to thorough blockage. I'm so tired of all this now.
#WomsLastStand #CatheterChat #FuckCancer
I'm heading North to dig a tunnel for you. I'm going to call it Harry. If I don't manage to dig it, hope you get out soon. #WomsLastStand #FuckCancer
A hospital meal in close-up. A hospital behind it
I may be gone for some time. Be lovely to each other while I'm away.
#WomsLastStand #CatheterChat #FuckCancer
It's just shit. Can they not give you the good painkillers at home? Or would you still have to go to A&E? Hugs to you both. #WomsLastStand #CatheterChat #FuckCancer
Back in A&E after a few hours of absolute agony. I hope none of you ever have to go through this.
#WomsLastStand #CatheterChat #FuckCancer
Unexpected District Nurse visit this afternoon to see if we want a hospital bed. Our house is so tiny I can't I imagine where it would go. She's sending a commode instead. It's like Carry On Cancer here some days
#WomsLastStand #CatheterChat #FuckCancer
@wombat37.bsky.social hey handsome. I’m not clever enough for a vlog of where I live, but here’s some pics from my stroll down the River Usk today. #Newport’s not so bad when the sun’s out and the tide’s in! #WomsLastStand #FuckCancer
I don't like to keep repeating myself, but what a shite night.
#WomsLastStand #CatheterChat #FuckCancer
Doctor: any pain at the moment?
Me: just the frequent stinging sensation at the end of my weenis.
Weenis, ffs. I think the cancer must have reached my brain.
#WomsLastStand #CatheterChat #FuckCancer
The worst thing about this stage of my cancer is that I'm constantly in fear of catheter blocks. The worry never goes away, so I can't ever relax properly. Except, young warriors, when I'm chatting to you. Thank you for the gift of calm x
#WomsLastStand #CatheterChat #FuckCancer
That was a hell of a night. Ugh, ugh and thrice ugh.
#WomsLastStand #CatheterChat #FuckCancer
Doctor turned up just as I'd entered a nap. Rats.
#WomsLastStand #CatheterChat #FuckCancer
Had a whore's bath, did a saline bladder wash, and now I'm utterly exhausted. Sitting back in bed. Might end up nodding off at this rate.
#WomsLastStand #CatheterChat #FuckCancer
I watch you dance,
full of life & air,
& ache to join you.
But these days I feel
the squirm of Death.
A smithereen once,
now it spreads inside
like blacksmear mould
creeping over old bones.
One day soon,
its wiry filaments rending my veins,
it will take me
& this door
will slam
shut.
#WomsLastStand
Every day you are with us is a good day. #WomsLastStand
It's also four weeks since The Christie gave me "months, maybe weeks" left to live. I'm really hoping to make it to Christmas at least.
#WomsLastStand #FuckCancer
Finding it hard today to summon the energy to do any little thing at all. I'm reminded that it's two years today since my first cancer diagnosis, followed two weeks later by an ambulance dash to hospital as my kidneys failed. I'm looking on those two years as a bonus.
#WomsLastStand #FuckCancer
Dying is so undignified.
#WomsLastStand
I'm so fed up of maintaining this catheter now. Cancer is such a demoralising, exhausting and infantalising disease. I'd like to hang around long enough to hold the #SummerRealm trilogy paperbacks in my hands, but occasionally I'm ready for it all to be over.
#WomsLastStand #CatheterChat #FuckCancer
Macmillan have arranged for me to have a blue badge, bless their supportive hearts. It will make parking at the hospital much easier.
#WomsLastStand #FuckCancer
@wombat37.bsky.social
Set up (part 2)
#KickWombatsBucket #FuckCancer #WomsLastStand
@wombat37.bsky.social
Let's get it set up (part 1)
#KickWombatsBucket #FuckCancer #WomsLastStand
Well that was an exhausting hour. Spent ages doing a tiny poo #constipation, then I had to clear lots of cancer gunk out of my catheter and change the collection bag. Slootly zorsted now. Nap time.
#WomsLastStand #CatheterChat #FuckCancer
@wombat37.bsky.social
Our flute has arrived!
#FuckCancer #WomsLastStand #KickWombatsBucket
Morphine may well ease your pains, but it also makes you sleepy and gives you constipation. Might try coming off it after speaking to my GP.
#WomsLastStand #CatheterChat #FuckCancer
I slept well last night,but there's always the fear every morning when I check my catheter that there'll be lots of clots in it. Cancer is terrifying. Got some to clear out this morning. Ugh.
#WomsLastStand #CatheterChat #FuckCancer
It’s okay. We’re all here holding space for you whatever you are feeling. I hope knowing that is a tiny comfort 🫂💗 #WomsLastStand #FuckCancer
