#doxyspawn i attended a virtual midwife talk yesterday and one of the things she attributed weight gain to was ofc the up to 15lbs of More Blood you can get, but also your uterus gets more muscle, which makes sense but i hasn’t considered/read
hope the scientific term is enbeefening of the uterus
#doxyspawn i suppose a key thing would simply be teaching that both you /and/ other people are important, and it’s about balancing both. not just “look out for #1 overall” /or/ “always do what’s best for others even if it’s at a detriment to yourself”
#doxyspawn i just know that life can be harder if you find it harder to be a little bit of an “asshole” and stand up for yourself at times 🙃
#doxyspawn so yeah if kiddo somehow was able to balance those things… that would be rad.
obvi i wouldn’t be disappointed in them or anything if they didn’t, lmao. good kid is still much preferable to asshole overall
#doxyspawn anyway Kabru came to mind bc he does things that can be considered manipulative or “bad” to further his own goals, but he’s ultimately a good person who wants to help others and doesn’t screw over people who don’t deserve it
#doxyspawn it would also make them harder to parent lol. like i’ve thought that if they argued with me and came up with a persuasive argument to do sth they wanted to do i’d prob be proud of them… but at the same time if they’re arguing with you constantly it will be hard, lmao
#doxyspawn but it seems really hard to walk a balance between teaching some of the latter stuff, while also making sure they don’t turn into a massive asshole who isn’t good to other people orz
#doxyspawn you can prob tell i’ve had sole Experiences here huh
#doxyspawn and sometimes it helps cover your own ass or is more diplomatic to lie or at least selectively tell the truth
- it’s /not/ bad to look out for yourself, actually, and you should bc again ppl might want to take advantage of you
#doxyspawn when the truth is more like…
- often you do not get rewarded simply for working hard, and at times you should protect yourself by giving less than 100% so you aren’t taken advantage of — see any average workplace
- you don’t actually owe it to everyone to tell them /everything/,
#doxyspawn e.g. it’s always “good” to:
- work hard and do your best
- tell the truth
- not be selfish, and help others
#doxyspawn but i guess i was thinking, like… growing up i was taught a lot of things that were “good”, but aren’t actually true to how the world works slash are things that can end up with you getting screwed over?
#doxyspawn i had a weird thought the other day which was something like, i’d be happy if my kid grew up to be like Kabru LMAO
which, like! not /exactly/! kid has some problems!!!
#doxyspawn #doxybends also, i finally looked up what diaphragmatic breathing is (another rec for pelvic floor training) and it's just belly breathing, the same kind of thing i've already done in yoga... helpful
#doxyspawn #diet that said, i'm still gonna stick to my plan of only drinking 200mg per day even after giving birth and breastfeeding bc it's healthier, instead of my usual fuckin... 400mg max suggested per day
#doxyspawn oh yeah, the 24hrs hospital admission stay, checks, food, prenatal vitamin etc was like US$30... half a private session cost
#doxyspawn #diet it's a bit disturbing to think abt how much more "me" i feel when i'm having caffeine but welp......
#doxyspawn but yeah i think me and L both like the idea of a party, maybe it can just be more low key, lol
#doxyspawn plus then the group becomes too /big/, like idk if a restaurant can accommodate that many ppl comfortably, plus maybe restaurant thing is annoying for former boss and his wife who have their toddler
#doxyspawn ig i could just go for an afternoon tea or a brunch or something, but then it gets expensive for people who are going...
#doxyspawn but yeah i'm rly not one for throwing parties... i'm not bothered to do themed snacks or decorations or games or anything lol. but if i don't want to do any of that then what's the point
#doxyspawn plus Wiki says it's usually a close friend who throws it. is it lame if i'm throwing it for myself??? my cousin did that with her ones for the family tho
#doxyspawn also baby showers are rly more of an American thing/American export. they don't really do them in the UK. i'm p sure my mom didn't have one for either me or my sister. idk. i've also only ever been to one myself (cousin's first kid)
#doxyspawn third, a lot of the pregnancy-themed game ideas seem really cringe to me, and i don't want to do them, lol
i also don't know if a party to celebrate transitioning into parenthood is sth i even want... idk
#doxyspawn so it might just end up looking lame and boring to ppl who attend.
second, it's another tradition that seems very gendered; it seems like it's not always the case now, but they started out more women-exclusive, which i don't want for obvious reasons
#doxyspawn first, the guest list will likely be very short, even if we combine my and L's friends (i wouldn't want it to just be for me). i wouldn't wanna invite anyone i'm not that close to and who isn't bothered about kids
#doxyspawn on another note, i'm doing a joint baby shower with cousin for family members, but idk if i want to do one for friends, for myself, lol. there are a lot of complications
falling to me and how i don’t like it but he keeps not doing anything about it
#doxyspawn really doesn’t make me feel confident for when baby arrives :/
#doxyspawn whatever i’m having a matcha latte today :/
#doxyspawn i want to get back to eating and drinking what i enjoy, wearing what i want, and doing the physical activities i like without having to limit anything :/
