Cluttered crafting supplies
#FromOneLine #hbp74
The House was too Crowded with hobbies galore. But he would just say "The Perks of Having a Crafty Spouse," and shrug.
Jazmin Quaynor unsplash.com
#writingprompt #humor #creatives
The main perk of having a crafty spouse is that you can keep destroying... I mean using stuff as nail file for your manicure, & they can keep fixing those things… Having a crafty spouse is a fairytale, though, as they also use everything in sight for their manicure w/o ever fixing a thing. #hbp74
My wife and I were on a luxury cruise, and just returned to our suite to find a stranger on the floor, a large blade protruding from his back.
Security burst in, guns drawn, saying "We had reports of a murder"
"There is no body here" said my wife calmly.
They left.
My wife is a crafty Jedi.
#hbp74
What happens when toast thieves target the wrong house?
mrericmontgomery.com/post/2025-01...
#flashfiction
#shortstory
#flashlit
#writingcommunity
#prompt
#hbp74
#hbp74
You're still playing that damn video game? You promised you'd make your special taco casserole tonight."
"I will. Just give me a few more minutes," I told her.
Thirty minutes later. "I got tired of waiting and made it myself."
I smiled. The perks of being a crafty spouse, I thought.
"You knew I was having an affair with your wife?!" The king was shocked.
"Of course, sire. And while she kept you busy, I armed the rebellion."
The knight smiled. His wife smiled. Metal glinted.
#hbp74 #creativewriting #writersofbluesky
One of the perks of having a crafty spouse is that our playroom is ever changing and there are always enough costumes for everyone.
#hbp74
#rollplay
#erotica
Joseph patted the shiny wooden box next to the detective. "Oh, yeah, my wife loved the perks of having a crafty spouse. I cut and shaped all the wood she painted. Nailed everything together; handled the fancy hardware. Even offered to make her coffin. Didn't bat an eye—she crawled right in."
#hbp74
“Oi, #punk!” Itzam yelped. The cooling #sweet had gone.
Sibrene reached for her herbs. Sprinkle and dash, a flick of the wrist: a whoosh, then cackling - thief into chicken. #Peace restored.
𝘉𝘢𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘈𝘕𝘋 𝘴𝘰𝘳𝘤𝘦𝘳𝘺, he mused. 𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘱𝘦𝘳𝘬𝘴 𝘰𝘧 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘢 𝘤𝘳𝘢𝘧𝘵𝘺 𝘴𝘱𝘰𝘶𝘴𝘦!
#vssdaily #vss365 #vssmagic #hbp74
I saw the pot float
2 the stove
That’s cracked top
Now sealed again
Like glaciers
Colliding
I willed water 2 boil
& pasta 2 cook & butter 2 melt
Over plump ziti & it swam Through the air
2 my mouth
& I awoke
2 my husband
Who did everything I dreamt
As if by magic.
#hbp74 #writing #poem #write
He sighed. “I lost my credit card— and on our honeymoon.”
“Good thing I made a backup,” she said, handing him a nearly identical card.
“Wait… what?”
She winked. “Crafty hands, dear. Perk of marrying a forger.”
He stared. “You’re joking, right?”
Her smile didn’t waver.
#hbp74
“I can’t believe he refused to give us the information!” I grumbled.
“Yep. That’s why I swiped the flash drive off his computer on the way out.”
I gaped.
“But if we released it, they’d trace it to us. So I used an unlocked workstation to email it to journalists.”
I kissed my crafty husband.
#hbp74
One-by-one she lowered his body parts into the vat of heated lye.
The perks of having a crafty spouse.
#hbp74 #twosentencehorror
There was a cloth that Clive had owned since childhood, passed his way by a great grandfather. It was a dark purple silk on one side, and crushed black velvet on the other. One side shimmered in the light and the other side drew the light in. It was no illusion, rooms darkened when this side was out. Clive had always felt the dread and had to tuck it away into a chest, wrapped around an elm wand. But today he got home and it was on the sofa. The sun should have filled the room with daylight, but it felt like an oppressive storm cloud was in the way. It pulled him in. His partner came in from deeper in the house holding a threaded needle with their thimble hand. “Don’t worry love, I’ll patch it up in no time.” Clive could only look confused. “The cat got at it somehow and ripped a hole in it. But that’s the perks of being crafty,” Ellis said. Before the needle plunged into the material Clive sat on the blanket. “Sorry, this happened before. I’ll be back in a minute.” He turned himself around, wrapping himself from head to toe. Ellis pulled at what they thought was a shoulder, but it lost its shape at their touch. Clive was gone, but the velvet looked fuller. If not for the second tear, like the first but bigger. Ellis began to suspect that this one was just big enough for human shoulders.
"The perks of having a crafty spouse," Bailey mocked. "I gotta be careful around fruit because my ex-wife keeps making bombs in the shape of them."
"Why fruit?" Jin said.
"I blame Cosmo for showing Amarula what a pineapple grenade and a cherry bomb looks like." #hbp74
"Perks of a crafty spouse?" I squinted up at the uniformed officer and smiled sheepishly.
"Ma'am," He shook his head and reached with keys toward my bracelets. "You realize the bank employees overheard the whole thing?"
"You never plan how you might test security somewhere, just for fun?"
#HBP74
"There must be perks of having a crafty spouse," one of his wife's co-workers said.
He stood there perplexed and replied, "She can't sew a stitch to save her life."
"Oh. Well, I saw this small, dark room earlier with handmade cloth dolls with pins stuck on some of them, that's all."
#hbp74
#hbp74 There are perks when you have a crafty spouse. There are also cons. Going to the garage for the right screw can take 3 hours. A list of annoying, petty jobs get pushed to the bottom of a list only he understands. And he rebuilds a room in a weekend for the pretty new housewife and a six pack.
#hbp74
"So, Hun... We wouldn't happen to know how to dispose of a body?" I asked, awkwardly.
Without missing a beat, my husband replied, "I can dehydrate the meat to make it easier to burn and I can grind up the bones for the garden."
"Have I mentioned lately how much I love you?" I smiled.
#hbp74 "There's magic in here."
#vss365
#writing #writingcommunity
Rocco squeezed another rivet into place and threw the pin over his shoulder. He’d clean after the bunker was complete.
Muffled yells broke his concentration. He turned to his bound family and winked at his wife. “I’m keeping y’all safe. Don’t you like the perks of having a crafty spouse?”
#hbp74
I am not crafty, not at all. Glad I have him. All I need to say is " Honey can you...." Before you know it, something has been made of nothing and I have that thing I need. Amazing. No questions asked. I might just keep him, simply because of the perks of having a crafty spouse.
#hbp74
Groaning, coming out of a sound sleep, Mark wanted to deafen the sound of a drill by grabbing Todd's now cool pillow. It was training, he reminded himself for when the adoption was finalized, but until then...
"The perks of having a crafty husband," he moaned, pulling himself out of the bed.
#hbp74
The perks of having a crafty spouse means always having ugly sweaters for Christmas parties.
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Photo: The timeworn workshop at the Eli Whitney Museum. Source: Tom Murphy VII, Public domain, via Wikimedia Commons.
Prose/dialogue: “The perks of having a crafty spouse.” #hbp74
#hbp74
I used to walk these tracks with my husband, back before the war took him away from me. The trees look beautiful from here. I have a good view of the village from here. I miss his warmth, his jokes, his smile. Planes fly overhead and my village is engulfed in hellfire. I'll be with him soon.
