I want to float an idea.

There's a version of being sensitive to the other person, of being aware of them and attuned to them, that isn't #AutisticMasking. 1/3

3. I am very #authentic to myself other than being the same as the crowd. I am my own person no matter what, anytime, anywhere. I rather be myself than have to be like someone else to fit in. It has came across with #autisticmasking. It made more sense when I read into it more about it.

#BlueSky

For Autistics, how people-pleasing usually develops is when the people around you are either telling you explicitly or kind of subtly giving you the message over and over and over, that your natural autistic reactions to things aren’t acceptable. 1/4

#ActuallyAutistic #Autistic #AutisticMasking

Masking isn't the same thing as being sensitive to other people. And being sensitive to other people isn't the same thing as masking. 1/2

#AutisticMasking #ActuallyAutistic #Autistic #Neurodiversity #AuDHD #unmasking

Original post on mastodon.social

I spent hours cooking for a table that remained empty. To me, a vague "okay" was a contractual commitment. To my guests, it meant nothing at all.
I discovered at forty-eight that my world is built on words that mean exactly what they say.
In this article, I analyze seven traits I have only now […]

At some point after learning to unmask, I started incorporating back more sensitivity and more attunement to the other person. Thinking about what their history is. What is it that they need? What will go over well? 1/2

#ActuallyAutistic #Autistic #Neurodiversity #AuDHD #AutisticMasking #unmasking

The book, "Autistic Masking: Understanding Identity Management and the Role of Stigma," by Amy Pearson and Kieran Rose. The cover is charcoal grey with a picture of a colorful chameleon on a branch. There are several sticky tabs hanging out of the book. The book is sitting on a grey and floral cushion.

Uta Frith says masking isn't real. Huh. That's weird, because there's a whole academic book (among other things) written about it.
Autistic Masking was published in 2023.
Somehow, I doubt she's read it. Sigh.
#AutisticMasking #AutismResearch #AuDHD

Neurodiversity In Discussion... : Masking And Identity Management Masking gets talked about like it’s a costume party gone wrong. Smile more. Sit still. Act “normal.” End of story. This episode says: not so fast. In the next Neurodiversity in Discussion, our...

Happening tonight at 6pm UK time! Autistic Masking and Identity!

neurohub.blog/events/6D0A7E

#ActuallyAutistic #autisticmasking #autisticidentity #autiaticwellbeing

Autistic masking is a trauma response; there was a good reason why it started, and it’s going to bring up all sorts of insecurities to not protect yourself in this way. 1/2

#AutisticMasking #unmasking #ActuallyAutistic #Autistic #Neurodiversity

I think the essence of masking is that you're taking on harm to yourself in order to avoid doing harm to others.

#AutisticMasking #ActuallyAutistic #Autistic #Neurodiversity #AuDHD

We can only override our needs for so long before the effects of doing so become unignorable.

#AutisticMasking #ActuallyAutistic #Autistic #Neurodiversity #AuDHD #unmasking #AutisticBurnout

However someone reacts to you disclosing to them that you’re autistic, that’s just their first reaction. It’s not necessarily going to be their last reaction.

#AutisticMasking #ActuallyAutistic #Autistic #Neurodiversity #unmasking

A functional #autistic life doesn’t come from imitating a neurotypical life.

#AutisticMasking #ActuallyAutistic #Neurodiversity #AuDHD #unmasking

Masking is a verb. They are things some of us do, not who we are.

I see them as descriptions of how I sometimes get by in the world, not a label of who I am.

#AutisticMasking #ActuallyAutistic #Autistic #Neurodiversity #AuDHD

Unmasking My Wardrobe Color Choices

buff.ly/FioQHRS

#AutisticMasking #ActuallyAutistic #Autistic #Neurodiversity #AuDHD #unmasking

Pretending not to be autistic, or to be like everybody else, takes so much energy and effort that there is little left for dealing with things that come up as part of everyday life.

#AutisticMasking #ActuallyAutistic #Autistic #Neurodiversity #AuDHD #unmasking #AutisticBurnout

There is no right or wrong answer on who you disclose your autism to. There are only choices and results, and you get to decide which combination you’re more willing to live with.

#AutisticMasking #ActuallyAutistic #Autistic #Neurodiversity #unmasking

For those of us who mask, it is often some version of oppressing ourselves, of believing that we were wrong to be the way we were. And at some point that was a belief that was helpful to us.

But it’s also a lie, and you don’t have to live with that forever.

#AutisticMasking #unmasking

Why You Hate Being Perceived

buff.ly/GVNyBhI

#ActuallyAutistic #AuDHD #Anxiety #AutisticMasking #unmasking

Unmasking your (autism/NDness) around family can be so hard if they were a big part of why you started. It’s okay to mask if you need to, to get through family time.

#AutisticMasking #ActuallyAutistic #Autistic #Neurodiversity #unmasking

The conversation about disclosing that you’re autistic isn’t simply imparting information to another person. You’re asking someone to reevaluate and change their conception of who you are.

#unmasking #AutisticMasking #AuDHD #ActuallyAutistic #Autistic #Neurodiversity

However someone responds to you telling them you’re autistic has a lot more to do with them than with you.

#unmasking #AutisticMasking #ActuallyAutistic #Autistic #Neurodiversity

Autistic masking makes autism a sort of ‘friendly disability,’ where I suffer so my friend (etc.) doesn't have to. I go out of my way to be "not a problem," so others aren't inconvenienced. It's exhausting.

#AutisticMasking #ActuallyAutistic #Autistic #Neurodiversity #AuDHD

Jade Farrington and I have published a new piece exploring #Autisticmasking and what 'unmasking' safely actually involves.

It brings together research, context and practical reflections often missing from mainstream discussions.

jadefarrington.substack.com/p/delving-in...

When we try to just “get over it”, we don’t learn how to deal with our own internal reactions to things in a more positive, useful way. All of the intensity just gets stored up and we brace ourselves against it.

#ActuallyAutistic #Autistic #Neurodiversity #AuDHD #unmasking #AutisticMasking #Sensory

A lot of us have been conditioned, often unintentionally but still very heavily, to deny aspects of our own experience.

#AutisticMasking #ActuallyAutistic #Autistic #Neurodiversity #AuDHD

If what you want is to meet people that understand you, but you're pretending to be someone that you're not, then no one who you ever encounter is going to really understand you.

#AutisticMasking #ActuallyAutistic #Autistic #Neurodiversity #AuDHD

Most of us, to varying degrees, learn to suppress our wants in order to live around other people. Or, we become so convinced that our wants are inappropriate that we suppress them.

#AutisticMasking #ActuallyAutistic #Autistic #Neurodiversity #AuDHD

Instead of, “I can’t unmask because no one will accept me,” what if it’s, “I must unmask because people already aren’t accepting this masked me?” What if it’s, “I need to find out who will accept the real me.”

#unmasking #AutisticMasking #AuDHD #ActuallyAutistic #Autistic #Neurodiversity

The Mask of Hades On Autistic Masking as a Form of Survival and Power

A reflection on autistic masking, trauma, and transformation, where survival becomes sovereignty.
#Autism #psychology #psychoanalysis #Philosophy #AutisticMasking #masking

medium.com/@christian.g...