Last night, a trio of elegant black women were in the garden singing catchy pop songs. They're not there this morning.
It's now minus Three Degrees out there.
#IThankYew

With his injury record, here's hoping he's Okafor most of the season.
#IThankYew #lufc

Saw the GP yesterday about me not being able to stop doing impressions of Jack Douglas.
Turns out I'm suffering from Way Hay Fever.
#IThankYew #FortheTeenagers

My mate is seeing a girl who identified as a narrow mountain pass. He's not sure whether he should toss himself off or block her passage.

#IThankYew

I'm annoyed that my wife's prediction of the time the temperature rose above 0 degrees Celsius was more accurate than mine.
I am a really thaw loser.
#IThankYew

"I've been interested in F1 for years, Jeremy. That Austrian driver who was badly burned was my hero. Niki whatisname"
"Lauda"
"I'VE BEEN INTERESTED IN F1 FOR YEARS, JEREMY..."
#IThankYew

Happy 56th birthday to David Batty.
My friend Gabriel was his form teacher at Allerton Grange School.
That's right, Gabriel was Batty's tutor.
#IThankyew
#lufc