Art by FurredDragonToons AKA SilverNightArts AKA Dergoon. A comic with a green dragon. First panel: "Why on earth would I kidnap a princess? You knights have the gall to accuse me of such a stereotypical-" Second panel: shocked expression, with the dragon saying "Oh wait.." Third panel, showing the dragon's butt with a tiny figure stuck between the cheeks, and the dragon saying "I was wondering why my butt was so itchy..."

#furry #furryart #macro #macroart #dragon #dragonthoughts

Art is by the adorable and talented @furreddragontoons.bsky.social !

I made a post a while back about this dragon/princess scenario, and then this goober went and drew it up as a comic 😆

Go check him out, he's fantastic!

#kaijuthoughts #dragonthoughts

I think I pinned down something that bothers me about some kaiju/dragon media with rampages:

It's only fun for me if the kaiju/dragon is having fun.

Image of the title screen from the Sony game LocoRoco.

#dragonthoughts #fat

A dragon feeding all their kobolds to the point they become little happy blobs.

And then the dragon cranks up the music and starts rolling them around:

#dragonthoughts

If you get up there early, you can behold the majestic dragon as he awakens, his vast fat bulk shaking the earth as he lumbers to the mouth of his cave, greeting the sunrise with a melodious roar:

BWUUUOOOOOOARRRRRRRRRRRRPP

#dragonthoughts

Thinking about dragons that love getting captives in cages sent to them, just so they can pop them open and take the cool cages home, leaving the confused "sacrifices" behind.

#dragonthoughts

(1/2) A kingdom having to offer up their fair princess as a sacrifice for the ruthless dragon each month. Every month, the brave knights of the realm have managed to rescue her, but only by placating the massive scaly beast and narrowly avoiding detection.

Text of a story idea that reads: "While exploring a dungeon, a band of adventurers come across a lone kobold standing next to a large flat rock, with small colored rocks and junk strewn on top. The kobold hastily squeaks about its "shop", explaining rapid-fire about how it's become a merchant, offering to sell its "fine wares" to the heroes. One of the adventurers scoffs at this "merchant", throwing the junk on the floor and taunting the stupid monster for even trying. The kobold runs off crying." "Later that day, the nearby capital is beset by a castle-sized dragon, roaring and stomping through the place, furiously demanding to know who dared make one of their beloved kobolds cry."

#dragonthoughts

This was too long to post in text, so I took a screenshot.

Never bully kobolds, it won't end well. Also, it's mean.

CW: #fart #dragonthoughts

Mighty fortresses sure look impressive, with their walls that can withstand thousands of boulders and ballista shots.

But one dragon "thunderstorm" and it all goes to pieces.

#dragonthoughts

"Why on earth would I kidnap a princess?! You knights have the gall to accuse me of such a stereotypical- wait..."

The dragon turned around and examined their cave-filling rump, a miniscule figure stuck to it.

"Huh. I was wondering why my butt was so itchy..."

#dragonthoughts

Even if you're a nice dragon, you still should keep the people in fear of you.

It's more fun to swoop and roar over towns when they're flailing and running, and the little sluggards need the exercise.

#dragonthoughts

-Town hosts baking competition
-Local dragon invites himself
-Dragon finds things so delicious that he jumps for joy
-Town has to be rebuilt from ensuing earthquakes

You know, I kinda always had this mindset that car washes were for people with kids as a way to amaze them- I never really just thought about going to do it myself just for the heck of it… #dragonthoughts

"Why do beautiful people taste better?
It seems hardly fair on the ugly.
They have such wonderful personalities."

#dragonthoughts

#dragonthoughts

An inspiring speech by the king to rally his army of thousands, swords shining and banners flying as the triumphantly charge their foe...

Only for the entire army to get squished under a scaly butt when the dragon sits on them.

Past a certain size, there's no strength in numbers.

#dragonthoughts

For an extravagant hatchday for a dragon, their partner commissions a replica town made of candy, so the gleeful dragon can rampage and devour it all.

#dragonthoughts

Allying with dragons means having to adjust towns and cities for them. Spaces to land, eateries, grooming stations, places to chat with the littles, etc.

Because if you don't make room for them, the dragons will just make their own room...

#dragonthoughts

If you're caught sneaking into a dragon's lair, everyone assumes the dragon will kill you.

Trust me, you *wish* the dragon just torched or ate you.

That gets boring. And there are far more *fun* ways to deal with interlopers...

#dragonthoughts

People think it's safe to sneak up on sleeping dragons. They're wrong.

Odds are you'll get buried under dragon fat when they roll over. Or get pinned to a wall by a giant foot from an idle leg kick.

And if they're having a wet dream...

#dragonthoughts

Halloween's coming up. Make sure you have enough candy.

It's gonna be real awkward when you have a dragon snout looming over your house and all you've got are 20 fun size bars.

#dragonthoughts

-Dragon is attacked by adventuring party.

-Dragon shrinks them down to toy size.

-Party enjoys the new size.

-Bewildered dragon now has to put up with new roommates/playthings.

#dragonthoughts

-Came across my old copy of Voyage of the Dawn Treader.

-Read the section where Eustace turns into a dragon.

-It reads like actual anti-dragon propaganda.

-Can I sue CS Lewis for defamation?

#dragonthoughts Kinda ran with an idea:

A twist on the usual "dragon kidnaps prince(ss), gets slain by knights".

The dragon does this, but it's just as an excuse to subtly train up the knights of the realm.

CW: #nsfw #dragonthoughts

Frequently, when opposing armies each hire a dragon to fight for them, the two castle-sized titans will decide it's much better for them to fuck each other than to fight.

This becomes awkward for the armies still on the battlefield, right next to the now-rutting giants...

#dragonthoughts

A kingdom knows of a wise dragon that lives in the mountains, but people have only seen his head and arms jutting out of his lair.

What they don't realize is that his belly and bottom half IS the mountain.

#dragonthoughts

We need more situations in medieval fantasy where ignorant rich nobles try inviting a dragon over to a fancy gala, as a flex on their snooty peers.

But the nobles vastly underestimate the consequences of inviting a mansion-sized, gluttonous, egotistical powerhouse to a party...

#dragonthoughts

Local dragon rider finds a ritual to enhance his dragon, giving him a bit of a size boost over his competitors.

An hour later, the rider's frantically flipping through the book for a "reverse" option, while the town and countryside is being engulfed under swelling dragon bulk...

#dragonthoughts

Grrr, the urge to be a giant dragon with little towns to take care of is so strong.

It's like playing the Sims, or a city builder game: getting to tend to their needs, ensuring they're safe and happy.

And in return, getting all their praise and treats~

#dragonthoughts

You're approaching the dragon's lair, hoping to seduce the dragon. What're you bringing or doing to raise your chances of success?

#dragonthoughts

Mages when they learn Giant Dragon Form: "Finally, all will bow before me! I shall become ruler of this pathetic realm! Mwahahaha!"

Ten minutes later: "OH NO OH GOD WHY IS EVERYTHING SO FLIMSY AND FLAMMABLE I'M SORRY THE TOWN IS ON FIRE AUGH I STEPPED ON THE BEST DONUT SHOP WAAAH"

#dragonthoughts

If Pavlov was a dragon:

"Observe how, after I swoop and roar and set roofs alight, the villagers present me with food and tribute! This is an example of a conditioned response!"