When I was little, my parents took me on a cruise, and on the first night was an evacuation drill. My father asked the officer running the drill, "Do ships like this sink often?"
The officer looked at him and shook his head. "No. Typically, it's just the once."
#BadJokes #OldJokes

Topical take on an old joke (RIP OG)...
youtube.com/shorts/hmK9f...
*My question*
I remember those cool whip 🥣 fondly...
But, now it does beg the question - why did every 🏡 need Diddy's "Freak Off" Season 2 amounts of Cool Whip?
#justjokes #moderntake #oldjokes #newspin

I was outside when truck with the local energy company logo on its door stopped in front of my house, and the driver leaned out his window.

"Excuse me," he said. "Do you know what time it is?"

I nodded. "Yep. Sometime between eight and four."

#OldJokes
#StillFunny

Christmas cake (anime)

#okshowa #oldjokes #notfunny

Patient: Doc, I have this pain in my right eye when I drink coffee

Dr: take the spoon out first.

#OldJokes

Fishy fish fshhhhh #badjokes #dadjokes #sillyjokes #fish #oldjokes #newmusic #originalmusic

A man walks up to a newsstand, looks over the covers of all of the newspapers, and walks away disgusted. The next day, he walks up, looks at the covers of all the newspapers, and again walks away disgusted. The third day, he repeats this, but the newsstand owner stops him and says, "Sir, I've seen you come by every day, and every day you look at the newspapers for a few minutes then walk away disgusted. Why?" "I'm looking for something?" "What are you looking for?" "An obituary." "But sir, you don't even open the newspaper! The obituaries aren't even on the front page!" "Oh, believe me, the one I'm waiting for will be."

#OldJokes

Do it

Eats
Shoots and Leafs/leaves

Like drunk punters in a brothel.

😆
#oldjokes

I joined the foreign legion twenty years ago to forget about a girl called Mary or was she called Susan or maybe June?

#OldJokes

Either; Apple is braver than the other techbros, the Gulf of Mexico is staying the GoM internationally or Apple Maps will take three years to update. 😂 #OldJokes

Back view of red kite diving from top right to bottom left, wings half retracted, head slightly turned in profile

Duck!
Yes, I know it's a red kite, DUCK!
#UKwildlife #birds
#oldjokes

British police shout “Stop! Or I’ll shout ‘stop’ again!”

#oldjokes

Why do #Python programmers need glasses?

They cannot C# ;-)

#OldJokes

Even your cat is demanding the Early Bird special? #oldjokes

Kangana had a promising cricket career, but then she was Ranaut.

#okbye #selfthoo #oldjokes

Saw my first Carry On film yesterday. I would have loved these as a kid in the1960s. #oldjokes #CarryOnCleo

the best way to get an actor to complain?

give him a job

#oldjokes #truthinjest

(I may come across as a bit harsh on old Nadine but I'd like to wish her every success in the jungle. Go Nads!) #OldJokes

Gay people should be allowed to get married…as long as it's to someone of the opposite sex! (Otherwise, that would be ILLEGAL!)

#oldjokes

@dhemery @jbtestpilot Gladiator: The Tiger's Tail #titlesubtitle #oldjokes

And now someone who needs no introduction:
#oldjokes