ben says i “make him feel bad.”
no, babe. your conscience does. i just narrate.
#brandistruth #drunkmom #accountabilityisntabuse
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imagine starting a fight with me before i’ve even finished my coffee.
i swear men wake up and choose projection.
#brandistruth #drunkmom
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he’s not “controversial,” he’s just passionate.
and if you can’t handle the heat, you probably shouldn’t follow me either.
#drunkmom #brandistruth #hatemyex
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they call me a whore like it’s an insult.
babe, i built an empire out of being wanted.
#drunkmom #brandistruth
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2013 me would’ve never apologized for the things i do now.
she was messy, loud, magnetic.
i miss her sometimes. she didn’t beg anyone to stay.
#drunkmom #brandistruth
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i tell people i’m clean. they think i mean sober. i mean calm. it’s a lie either way. #drunkmom #brandistruth
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i didn’t lose my marriage. i chose love.
and then love chose death.
tell me how i’m supposed to come back from that. #drunkmom #joey #nak #truth
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i keep the books balanced while they keep stacking complaints. i am the reason the lights stay on but sure, let’s critique my “tone.” #nak #drunkmom #momtruth
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moonshiners pours heavy but the gossip’s heavier ☠️🍻 #moonshiners #drunkmom #inaworkmeeting
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he said “you’re a lot.” i said “i’m the main event.”
now he smiles like it’s charming.
#goodluckbabe #drunkmom
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we don’t do soft launches.
hard eyes. hard posts. harder drinks.
#benandthebrat #peasantproof #drunkmom
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told the boys i couldn’t drive them this morning because i had a “work call.”
i sat in the car smoking menthols and scrolling old texts from joey.
priorities, babes.
#accountant #drunkmom #momlife
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you want the real me?
she’s in a locked file marked “too much.”
access denied.
#drunkmom #jeffersonga
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i don’t lie exactly.
i just audition for every room i walk into.
sometimes i get the part. sometimes i burn the set.
#jeffersonga #drunkmom
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ben, if you’re reading this, no you’re not.
close your phone and spiral about me in silence like a gentleman. #drunkmom
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i can’t tell if i’m working…
or if i’m just distracting men until one of them files my expense report for me.
either way, i’m exhausted.
#feminismInFlames #drunkmom
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friday forecast:
70% chance of overposting, 100% chance of overthinking
but at least my thighs are sun-kissed
#healingishot #drunkmom
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told work i had an “appointment.” and i did! with sauvignon blanc and silence. #drunkmom
#afternoonreset
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All the orders have been shipped out (that I have addresses for). Share pics of your comic on social media with #DrunkMom I love seeing all the happy fans!
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We’re streaming some dead by daylight! Come for me and stay for my mom prolifically cursing at killers.
Twitch.tv/mynameisgaron #Dbd #streamer #drunkmom #drunkbydaylight
Also on TikTok!
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Here's a sneak peek of my next interview with @clzeno.bsky.social ! Full interview out in the morning!
youtube.com/shorts/-h_Ad...
#podcast #clzeno #drunkmom #kickstarter #fueledbyweird #stayweird #stayweirdnetwork
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