Teacher's Sacrifices #laughteristhebestmedicine #damomjokes #silly #corny #funny #jokes #laughter #laughterisgoodforthesoul #iamcorny #imsocorny # #lol #lmao #lmfao #foryoupage # #itsmamalawson #laughteristhebestmedicine #dadjo kes #momjokes #silly #corny #funny #jokes #laughter
🐟 I've been trying to talk to my pet fish about his feelings, but he's a little koi.
#humor #puns #jokes #momjokes #humour #dadjokes #groan #funny
🐓 Why haven't chickens changed their sound?
They can't think outside the bawks!
#humor #puns #jokes #momjokes #humour #dadjokes #groan #funny
🎩 A friend said she did not understand cloning…
I told her that makes two of us.
#humor #puns #jokes #momjokes #humour #dadjokes #groan #funny
🎩 What's made of brass and sounds like Tom Jones?
Trombones!
#humor #puns #jokes #momjokes #humour #dadjokes #groan #funny
✅ I got hired at the thermometer factory…
It's just temp work.
#humor #puns #jokes #momjokes #humour #dadjokes #groan #funny
🤣 When you fart it can be either silent or loud…
And then there’s the turd option
#humor #puns #jokes #momjokes #humour #dadjokes #groan #funny
📅 I lost my dictionary the other day and my wife asked if I looked upstairs…
I said "no, I can't look up anything!"
#humor #puns #jokes #momjokes #humour #dadjokes #groan #funny
📋 I've got a job making plastic Draculas…
There's only two of us working here so I have to make every second Count.
#humor #puns #jokes #momjokes #humour #dadjokes #groan #funny
💰 What's the difference between a jeweler and a jailer?
One sells watches, the other watches cells.
#humor #puns #jokes #momjokes #humour #dadjokes #groan #funny
🤖 My wife handed me two kayak paddles and asked, "Which one do you want?”…
I said, "I'd take either oar."
#humor #puns #jokes #momjokes #humour #dadjokes #groan #funny
"Be like the Artemis spacecraft and go splash!" - Me telling my teenage son to take a shower. #momjokes
🍹 Do you know why people talk louder when they drink?
Because alcohol is measured by volume.
#humor #puns #jokes #momjokes #humour #dadjokes #groan
🎶 My partner doesn't want to karaoke with me tonight, so I have to duet alone
#humor #puns #jokes #momjokes #humour #dadjokes #groan
🎩 What did the turkey say to the hunter on thanksgiving?
Quack quack.
#humor #puns #jokes #momjokes #humour #dadjokes #groan
🪜 My dad was showing me his tool shed, and pointed to a ladder. "That's my stepladder," he said…
"I never knew my real ladder"
#humor #puns #jokes #momjokes #humour #dadjokes #groan
💼 I applied for a job hanging mirrors…
It's something I can really see myself doing.
#humor #puns #jokes #momjokes #humour #dadjokes #groan
🤖 My grandfather invented the cold air balloon…
Unfortunately the idea never got off the ground.
#humor #puns #jokes #momjokes #humour #dadjokes #groan
⏱️ I'm looking for my "Gone in 60 seconds" DVD…
It was here a minute ago!
#humor #puns #jokes #momjokes #humour #dadjokes #groan
🎭 I love telling cheesy jokes, but my friends are laughtose intolerant.
#humor #puns #jokes #momjokes #humour #dadjokes #groan
🎠 The person who invented the ferris wheel never met the person who invented the merry go round…
They traveled in different circles.
#humor #puns #jokes #momjokes #humour #dadjokes #groan
🐠 Why don't fish write great pop songs?
They hate catchy hooks
#humor #puns #jokes #momjokes #humour #dadjokes #groan
📺 I heard on the news that some guy was stealing wheels off police cars…
The police are working tirelessly to catch him.
#humor #puns #jokes #momjokes #humour #dadjokes #groan
🌟 Lost my life's research on how to cure excessive itching…
Looks like I'll have to start from scratch
#humor #puns #jokes #momjokes #humour #dadjokes #groan
😂 I stayed at a horrible motel called The Fiddle…
in reality it was a Vile Inn
#humor #puns #jokes #momjokes #humour #dadjokes #groan
🤒 I'm so sick of the letter N…
Always being the center of attention.
#humor #puns #jokes #momjokes #humour #dadjokes #groan
⌨️ I saw a man and a woman wrapped in a big barcode…
. I said "are you two an item?"
#humor #puns #jokes #momjokes #humour #dadjokes #groan
Waking up to people sharing my post about my challenges with SNAP right now (not my pinned ask for help) and getting some more help financially is really a blessing. I am going in for my broken tooth extraction (thanks Medicaid!) at 2:30pm today. Realized it's at tooth-hurty and chuckled. #momjokes
