💯 And that's us saying that, as @phish.com #phans

Mononeon, Oteil, Chris Dave...seems the only people pissed at Marcus are white suburban #phans. Seems those people should be more grateful to us for fixing America for them with our online outrage and virtue. Anyone not #ophended we said "those people" is canceled. There. We fixed racism too.

Has there ever been a ‘More’ contradictive fanbase? 😆 #phish #phans

Donate to Support Reggie Bannister’s Hospice Care, organized by Billy Ferguson Reggie Bannister, beloved star of the Phantasm movie franchise, has brought jo… Billy Ferguson needs your support for Support Reggie Bannister’s Hospice Care

Calling all #Phantasm #Phans
Our beloved Reggie Bannister has #lewybodydementia and #parkinsons and is receiving in-home hospice care. He is unable to appear at conventions, which means he and his wonderful wife Gigi need the phans to rally to their aid! gofund.me/6bdaaa021

Bad people like us #phans a group made entirely of bad apples?

Didn't we tell #phans to leave us alone at work? Don't come down here taking pictures while we are stirring up batches of gopher gravy.

ICAO: 48660D
Flt: PHANS PH-ANS null
Time: 2026-01-24 15:04:51 CET
Min Alt: 3350 ft
Min Dist: 5.1 nm (-52° NW)
Squawk: 0427

dev adsb planefence by kx1t -•sdr-e•airplanes•flightaware

ICAO: 48660D
Flt: PHANS PH-ANS null
Time: 2026-01-24 14:54:37 CET
Min Alt: 2050 ft
Min Dist: 7.6 nm (-61° WNW)
Squawk: 0427

dev adsb planefence by kx1t -•sdr-e•airplanes•flightaware

Sounds like we missed a good cable news adjacent #PhishBeef. What were Jake and Katy's #ophenses that #ophended #phans? Last we'd heard they were quite popular. #WhatsTheOphense

Being apex #inphluencers here on the bluesky platform #phishbeefs would be remiss if we failed to tell you about our sponsor Entitlemints breath mints, the best way to keep #phans away from *your* fucking spot in the pit. Try the Reindeer Randy flavor for maximum bobbing and weaving space. #MePhirst

We give these guys and their public a hard time but this is fantastic. Happy New Year you #unphuckable #phans who have no clue why Prince would make a song about dairy products.

Longer that we expected too. Gosh if the band @phish.com had a nickel for every time they heard that from a groupie they wouldn't have to overcharge #phans for admittance. #phlemsg

No, that's just the vibe in Aspen. Everyone but the working class there act like #phans defending their spot in the pit.

Sounds like security were almost as successful in crushing free will as most #phans. Sorry you had to deal with that.

What about Huckabeef curtains? We ask because all of the jerks who enjoy engaging in #phishdrama blocked us and need to find something to have a #phishbeef with someone about. We are desperate. Can anyone here engage us in drama? Aren't there any entitled #phans who still see our posts?

It is, #phans are just lazy.

(It's just a trick to get #phans to line up across the Hudson so we can be phirst in line at MSG) #mephirst

How is it the Thin Lizzy people are capable of stimulating online discussion but not #phans?

See what can happen when #phans make an honest effort while Phish tickets go on sale? The rest of these kids are just lazy. Do better like A.Baier.

We here at #phishbeefs do awful and absurd satirical humor exploiting the sensibilities of #phans in hopes our groaners will help them deal with the horrors of life in the 5.0 era. In times when misappropriated word or pronoun can cause a melt, we know 'good persons' will not always understand.

We know @thrillhousegaming.bsky.social would block us but don't want us to win. That's fucking class and strategy. We've seen the selfies and admit they are more #phuckable than most #phans. What you doing after the @yolatengo.bsky.social show tonight, Mr Thrillhouse? Does it involve a mate snifter?

We here at #phishbeefs do awful and absurd satirical humor exploiting the sensibilities of #phans in hopes our groaners will help them deal with the horrors of life in the 5.0 era. In times when misappropriated word or pronoun can cause a melt, we know 'good persons' will not always understand.

If #phans have not figured out who we are yet they are obviously slow enough to be President of the United States of America.

Tried this in the modern age. Burned our expensive cellular phones. Now they won't open the spotify app so we can't listen to Goose's chart toppers inhibiting our familiarity with the latest lyric references thus screwing up our ability to fit in at school this fall. Thanks for the tip, 1.0 #phans.

These #phans traveled quite a distance and fought their way to the front of the pit but they don't look like they are enjoying the show. Cool pins at least. #MePhirst

We'rs sorry but the shit hit the fucking fan much much harder during a 1993 second set PYITE opener than any of this 5.0 bullshit. #Phans are just fucking children in 2025. Children. Fish up to nice things in Mike's but he still does that now unlike that awful lil' @treyantipasto.bsky.social prick.

BITCH GET A FUCKING GUN THIS SHIT IS FOR REAL THE RHETORIC WON"T SAVE US NOW!

Sorry. We meant to say "Wow the Phish from Vermont is quite a band but we do like to poke fun at #phans while we listen" not sure why we just said that first thing.

Have #phans tried beating themselves over the head with their laptops until they're bloodied while on cue? No. We bother the band @phish.com by tagging them in our skeets instead of trying hard enough. Trey is eating a Faberge egg omelette right now. Don't bother him with your failure you losers.

We almost have sympathy for those who tried today, but no. You just aren't good enough. It's you, not Ticketmaster. Get it together, #phans.

We wouldn't bang any of those #unphuckable #phans so you won't have to compete with members of our team. Thank your lucky stars. Maybe the one in the tie-die. Come to think of it, can you get us his digits?